Why did the dinosaur rent a DVD in Redbox about a sex? Because he didn't own a Blu-Ray player.

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Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? Because it was dead.

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If a man shouts in a forest and there is no woman around to hear him, is he still wrong? He could be, he could not be. It really depends on what he says. The greater concern is that he's shouting alone in the forest. Either he's in trouble or he has a major psychology disorder.

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Jesus walks into a hotel, slams four nails down on the counter, and says, "Put me up for the night!" The concierge looks at him and says, "You're not Jesus. Jesus was brutally murdered approximately 1,970 years ago. And although I may not be a believer, his teachings have brought comfort and solace to millions of people around the world. Nor do we accept nails as payment. Please remove yourself from the premises or I will call security."

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Hey I just met you and this is crazy but here's my chew toy throw it maybe!

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What was the last thing that went into the head of the space pilot of the Challenger shuttle right before it crashed? He was probably thinking about his wife and family...

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What's green and blue, and red all over? Nothing. It if were red all over it wouldn't be green and blue.

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What's black, white, and red all over? A: Me after domestic abuse.

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What happened when Johnny fell off of his bike? He suffered a very tragic and fatal brain hemorrhage resulting in a lower population by a minute percentile that is undetectable by the US Census.

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What's the richest fish in the sea? The one you threw a quarter at.

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why did the mexican work for a lawn care service I don't know why don't you ask him

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What do you get when you mate a rhino with an elephant? Nothing. This mating cannot produce offspring.

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Keith figured gasoline burns, doesn't it? He was wrong.

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What is funny? Your football official having a heart attack

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A duck walks into a convenience store and asks for a tube of chapstick.He says "Put it on my tab".

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I came up with one when my friend Sam told me the fortune from her Jone's Soda. A change of heart may lead to a new living environment, a change of heart may also lead to death.

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How meny Jews can you fit in an ash-tray? None. There to big

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I like school Said no one ever.

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Yo momma so stupid she scored poorly on her SAT's in high school. She couldn't graduate college and now works a dead end job as a waitress.

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What do retards eat for lunch? Grilled Cheese

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What is the best way to deal with a broken ankle? Ear Lobes.

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hi im bob i ate a Pickle sucked a boob and died of a haert atak

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Cacti are green Clouds are white Spoons are silver Corn is yellow Carrots are orange Asphalt is black Grapes are purple Cinnamon is brown Lets's have sex

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3 Men walk into a bar, they all order up a drink. And then they paid their tabs and left.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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