How did Richard the lion heart get his name? From his parents.

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Why didn't the man get into Harvard? Because he had bad grades

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You should get a new joke book............ because the newest edition has just be released

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How do you survive the end of the world? You can't- everyone will die!

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What happened to the chicken that crossed the road. It got hit by a fridge.

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Sarah Jessica Parker walks into a bar. Bartender asks her, "why the long face?". She tells him it's from her parent's genes.

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You'er moma is so stupied that she climbed over the glass window to see what on the other side

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What did the straw say to the other straw? We are both straws just kidding they cant talk

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Roses are red, Violets are blue, I hate you, Go die in a hole.

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What did one tampon say to the other? Nothing. They were both stuck up bitches

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Roses are red, Metal is gray, Justin Beiber, is very gay

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What did lil' Suzy do when she got home from school? She was violently mutilated by a bear then continually but raped by a man she met on the Internet. Needless to say, she had a great time. -Harrison

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How many holes can you poke in my chest, When my chest is by far the best If you believe you can stab Then then grab a knife...that you can grab Skewer my breast Which lies on the best chest And you will discover A man under your covers Yes, keep on pokin' Poke my chest with the knife you are strokin' And then swallow a chode because you are stupid.

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A man walked into a bar. Ouch.

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Knock knock. Whos there Time to get a watch

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Why was the truck making noises? It was backing up.

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It's April Fools Day... APRIL FOOLS!!!

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What did the spoon say to the other spoon? Nothing, it is a spoon.

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What do you get when you cross a black guy and a keyboard? A black guy punctured by a keyboard

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1: Hey whats better than bacon? 2: What? 1: Nothing. Nothing is better than bacon.

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women's rights

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What did the cat say to the dog? Meow.

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How do get a cat to like you? Give it lots of love and attention

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Why did the black man go to portugal? Because he was very hard working and needed a vacation.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops