Two trains, each having a speed of 30km/h, are headed at each other on the same straight track. A bird that can fly 60km/h flies off the front of one train when they are 60km apart and heads directly for the other train. After reaching the other train, the bird flies directly back to the first train, and so forth. What is the total distance the bird travels before the train collide? Who cares about the bird if two trains are going to collide? You need to call this in immediately.

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A brunette, a redhead, and a blond are all stuck on an island 100 miles away from the nearest civilization with no resources. After 2 weeks, they decide that no one is going to save them and they have to swim for it. The brunette swims 25 miles and then gets eaten by sharks. The redhead swims 75 miles and then drowns. The blond swims 99 miles but got tired, so she swam back.

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How can you make a Russian happy? Giving him two tickets for him and his wife to Disneyworld.

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What do you call a white man without a face? Dead. What do you call a black man without a head? Negger.

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A Black Child just received his ivy-league diploma and hugged his dad.

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wanna hear a cat joke? just kitten

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what did the toe say to the other toe? nothing they cant speak

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this website even though its hilarious.

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How does it change many dyslexics take to a lightbulb.

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Shah I'm being chased by a man riding instead a pig in a caravan smoking Apparently I'm a man riding on a pig in a caravan smoking

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A man walks into a bar and says, "Hey, Jim, your wife just died from terminal cancer." Jim then says, "Cool. Hey, do you know if the games on tonight?"

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Is that a banana in your pants or do you just have an abnormally large penis?

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Why couldn't Helen Keller drive? At age two, she contracted an illness that left her blind, deaf, unable to speak, and was considered backwards of intelligence. She lived in a dark and hopeless world of her own, rendering her unable to do anything, let alone drive.

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You remind me of something What? Monday Why? Nobody likes you

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What did Mel Gibson say to the African-American? I'm sorry

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I rode in to town on an ass... ur momas ass!!

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What did the little boy get for Christmas? Nothing, he's Jewish

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what kind of road kill is green and smells like cookies?

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Why do bitches love cheese toast? 'Cuz bitches love cheese toast

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Why did the math student refuse to do his geometry homework? Straight lines do not exist, so there is no real world application to any geometric shape.

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Why doesn't a ducks quack echo? Actually, it does, but the echo is imperceptible to human ears.

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what did the asian say to the other asian "where both asian"

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What's white and can't climb trees? A fridge

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Why was the All-black Basketball team disqualified? Because they all died in a hotel fire.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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