Wha'ts the difference between Justin Beiber and a piece of hot muff garbage? Fart triscuits.

Yes

Why does manure smell like poop? Because it is poop.

What did the little calculator grow up to be? Nothing

A man crawled up to a water fountain but fell because he had no legs

Q How is it Going Patty? A:Hi Patrick hows it going?

How many infants does it take to paint a house? Forty-Seven.

did you hear about the argument between jamie jacob and dylan? daniel killed them all

How do you wake up Lady Gaga? You set the alarm for a reasonable time. - Louis

Why did the monkey fall off? It had no more lives. Why did the second monkey fall off? I dunno. Why did the third monkey fall off? Since the second was unknown, the third does not exist. Why did the little girl died? It's pretty obvious.

What did the first ant say to the second ant? Nothing. Ants are incapable of communicating via speech.

[Set up] [No punch line]

what did the dog say to the mailman? "hey thanks for the mail" the mailman replies "your welcome"

What's worse then 2 dead monkeys? 3 dead monkeys!

Why did the black man eat the fried chicken? He was hungry

What did the orphan do on his birthday? He burned down his orphanage, he hated the place because he was severly abused.

Q: What happens if you pee on a rock and scraches it on a tree? A: The tree gets wet

"I vant to blood your suck!" warned Darcula.

whats worse than getting lost in europe? becoming the middle in the human centipede.

y was John so sad becaus his mom took his phone

What is big, blue, and eats rocks? A big blue rock eater.

What's the difference between a horse and a house? 1 letter.

One day, 2 people were gonna fight after school and then the final bell rung. Everyone gathered in the bathroom to watch the fight. The challenger asks the opponent, "Hey whats that one thing you say when you let the other person win?" then the opponent says, "I give up?" The opponent yells, "I win!"

Jimmy comes home from school one day and goes to his mother. "Mommy, guess what?" "What?" "I had sex with my teacher today!" Naturally after hearing such news the mother gets appalled and tells her husband. "Well, that's my boy" he says "Now that your a man Jimmy we're going to go out and get some drinks tonight be ready in a half an hour." So they arrive at the local bar "Wait here son, you can sit down and save us a table and I'll go get the drinks ok?" "No dad I think I'll stand" "..why? What's the matter son?" "My butt hurts"

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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