What did the kid say to the ice-cream Man Can I have a duck please

What do you call a Welshman with a stick up his arse? A very odd man

Why did the deer stop running? It was hit by a car

There was an old lady who swallowed a fly. But everything turned out alright, as the fly was dissolved by stomach acid.

A student goes up to the teacher because he has to go to the washroom. The teacher tells him that he has to sing the ABC's before he can go. So the boy sings, "ABCDEFGHIJKLMNOPQRSTUVWXYZ." The teacher said he did a perfect job and could go to the washroom. The boy went on to become a billionaire. Congrats!

why was the boy sad He was just abused by his parents and had aids

Your mom is so fat she decided to get out of bed and exercise because she realized her health would become serious and wanted ot do something about it.

Why did the officer arrest the black man? Because he suspected him of littering. ...and because he was black.

I guy goes into a coffee shop and says I'll have a coffee and a danish. The clerk says we're all out of danish. The guy says I'll just have the danish then.

What do you call a fish with no I Defected at birth

How did the boy fall off the swing? He got hit by a fridge

What does an elephant and a grape have in common? One of them is purple.

"Hey ask me if i'm fat" "Are you fat" "Leave me alone"

WELCOME TO THE GARLIC BOYS SHOW! So kids, what are we gonna eat today? POTATOES! FUUUUUUU! Moral: You say tomata, I say WROOOOOOOONG, you say cheap I say your mother.

What's worse than dropping your loli-pop? The Holocaust

What is an offensive way to refer to black people from the time of the Flint Stones? Niggers

Why did Sally fall off the swing She had no arms Knock knock. Who's there? Not sally

Have you seen Ray Charles' new house? Neither has he...

knock knock who's there greg greg who greg is crying because his grandma dementia made her forgot all about him

Mickey Mouse peed on a house what color was it? It wasn't a color, or any pee for that matter. Mickey Mouse is a fictional character for children's amusement.

What do you call six white guys on a bench? Six white guys at the park

How many gays does it take to change a lightbulb? It's COMPLETELY circumstantial.

Why was the poor man poor? Because he doesnt make money

Roses are red Violets are blue. most poems rhyme but this one doesn't!

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...