How can you tell if a duck is under your bed? Look under your bed

Why did the koala fall of the tree? Because it was dead. Why did the other koala fall off the tree? It was stapled to the first koala.

what did the super popular, beautiful girl say to her stalker? i dont know, i wasnt the stalker.

What did the farmer say to the other farmer? We are both farmers.

When the going gets tough... Commit suicide.

They say that there's more than one way to skin a cat...so far iv only found the one.

If a bunch of midgets do the wave, is it a ripple ?

What's the difference between a Obama and a drug-dealer? I don't know what? I don't know, I was asking if you know...

If life gives you melons. You may be dyslexic.

Barack Obama.

So you're floating down a river on a two story canoe. How many pancakes does it take to cover a dog house? Four because snakes have no legs.

What did the blonde say to the other blonde? "Hey, do you want to get something to eat?"

Why are ginger's jokes not funny? Because they're gingers.

rodents are bed violents are glue i have lysdexia and short attention spa

Why was the cat unable to drink its milk? He was stapled to the wall

roses are red, violets are blue, if ruddell was black, he would smell of poo.

Q: How many babies does it take to paint a wall? A:I don't know i was asking you P.S. leave your answer in the comments below :D

Hey do you have a suitcase? Why? I need one.

knock knock who's there Bob I don't know you Bob and if you don't get off my porch this minute i'm calling the authorities.

So a baby seal walks into a club.

A shoemaker walks into a bar holding a shoebox with only one shoe inside. The bartender gives him a drink and asks "Say mister, why are you carrying that shoebox with one shoe?" The shoemaker says "Well sir, it's a long story." The bartender says "Okay, give me the short version." The shoemaker says "Okay, long story short, I'm not really a shoemaker." The bartender asks "Well buddy, what are ya?" The shoemaker gets up from his chair and says "I'm a guy missing shoe."

what doesn't kill you makes you crippled for life because you lost use of your legs in a tragic car accident

My daughter got a kinder surprise with cool toy today..... i killed her i didnt even want the toy

Why did the car drink Slurpies? I don't know. Why? Doorknob. Carl was unsure on what his friend, Frank meant when he told his joke, but then again who IS sure? Frank is the only one who truly knows what happened that day on August 13th 2010 when his mother came over for a surprise visit to her son's house just as Frank was heading out the door about to get in his truck and buy groceries, unaware that his mother was standing outside and bending over to ring the door bell not to expect Frank opening the door with his quick and violent actions thus hitting his mother in the face as the door swung open. Frank hadn't known his mother was at his house nor even remembered him but there she was, past out bleeding to death on his front lawn. It was Frank's fault that day, when his mother past away and reason why Frank hides his anger through his jokes. If only he hadn't opened that door he tells himself every night. Now he's cursed himself with his odd humour of using doorknobs as punchlines to hide his grief of his loss. And with that, Carl replies; Ummm.... I don't get it.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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