Why couldn't the black man get out of jail? He couldn't post his bond.

What did the Irishman say to the German? "Sorry, do you have the time?"

Don't you just hate it when a sentence doesn't end the way you octopus?

Sorry we dont serve time travlers here. A man walks into a bar.

If two blondes had a kid it would probably be a blonde because two recessive chromosomes have a higher chance of showing than one dominant gene.

That awkward moment when the moment is awkward.

Whats worse than getting raped by a cow? Getting raped by two cows.

What's disabled and red all over. The kid I hit with my car.

What do you call a zebra with no stripes? A zebra with no stripes

Q: How do you do to get an elephant down from a tree? A: Wait for the fall when the leaves start falling you shoot it down.

Robocop The Reboot reboot. Watch as The friendly robot named Murphy, is violently broken down by a horrible shower of water, the only means to save him is to transfer his data into a human. He awakens again as Robofriendlydude (starring Adam Sandler) as a robot learns to love, learns to share, learns to dance with children in this years Reboot of the classic love comedy Robocop. PG-3 "So good I could only watch five seconds of it" Rotten potatoes. 99 percent fresh. "Kill me with a chainsaw" Honest reviews. "AWESOME!" Dishonest reviews "Makes Twilight seem like the better lovestory" Everyone.

What's black and hangs from a tree? A tire swing.

What happens when you Shoot a guy with a red Shirt On? He Dies.

A chicken walked into the bar...

what can keep u alive for many years- -not being shot

YOU MEAN SHE ACTUALLY EVER LIKED ME? WOOOOAAAAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHH! Anyway, tell her to contact me here, during the number of letters up there divided by a certain number you got over there, minus the letters here subtracted with the VEEEEEEERY same ammoooouuuuunt... Moral: God I need to invent a code system that makes me sound less like Jim Carrey on crack...

Q. Why did the television set turn on? A. Because someone pressed the power button.

What did the woman say to her abusive husband? You're hurting me.

What did The Black man have for breakfast? Bran Flakes.

What happens to a blonde girl who is buying drugs off of a drug dealer? Nothing, she was an undercover police officer trying to arrest said drug dealers on the street.

roses are red violets are blue wanna hear a joke? WNBA....

roses are red, violets are red, ive been shot in the eye with a pelet gun, please ,please help

What do you get when you cross a dog with an anteater? An animal unlikely to survive beyond infancy.

Your mother is so fat that when she jumps into a pool, she displaces a proportionately larger amount of water than people with normal body mass indexes or BMI

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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