what can jump higher than a tree? anything that can jump because everyone knows that trees cannot jump.

Q. Why did the man get an email? A. Because he checked his inbox.

How do you stop a black man from running? You shoot his knee caps.

Q: What did the boy with cancer get for Christmas? A: He died on Christmas Day, before his parents could tell him they had maxed out their credit cards to take him to Disney World. His father has since relapsed into alcoholism. He knows his wife is cheating on him with another man, but understands that she needs comfort that he cannot give her.

There is a horse sitting at a bar, and the bartender says MOTHER OF GOD!! What is this horse doing in here?!

Want to hear a joke? ...you're straight.

What's bad about being a ghost with no arms or legs? You're dead.

So Colton Yepma walks in to Accounting and proceeds to read jokes

whaT DID HEVEN SAY TO THE FRIDGE hAVE YOU GOT A COLD

What do elves get for Christmas? Overtime.

Why did the black guy lose the race? He toke an arrow to the knee

How much does a polar bear weigh? About 800 pounds

What happened to the boy with cancer? He died.

What do you call someone without legs or arms laying at your front door? Steve

why did the mexican steal the money? because he was financially struggling and needed the money to support his family

Haunnaka in 1940's Germany. six thousand people die. in one minute.

Why does the pope doesn't use this finger? (raise a finger) That's mine!

What's worse than seeing your grandfather dead on the floor? Seeing your grandmother standing over him with a knife

why did the child kill his mother because the child gave his mom AIDS

what do you get when you cross a bulldog with a shitshu? a puppy.

why did the man french kiss the horse? because he was high on l.s.d and confused the horse for an attractive male because he himself was homosexual ps vagina monkeys and chili

Variants: :) I will always assist you in whatever you want. :( I want to kill you all by myself! Sense? Non? Fuck? Mind? Fission Mailed? Impossible Mission.

Knock Knock Who's there? The police. The police who? Your wife has been killed in a car accident.

A drunk guy walks into a car

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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