Roses are red violets are red I think I'm bleeding It's getting in my eyes

How the hell do you know? What are you Nero? You are completely right! I was going to say I got no blue tie, but then I forgot you often call ribbons for ties... How? Should I be scared? I am not, no wonder you never felt human... I am shocked, I cant think straight I am confused and... Sorry Nero, Goodnight, if nothing else, you are no demon, but rather an angel, sweet dreams love. The solvemedia says the bible, this is freaky, my mind is numb.

What do Michael Jackson and a throbbing, greasy, overcooked Shitake Mushroom have in common? Nothing. Just nothing at all.

What did Hitler get his son for Christmas? An Ez-bake oven and a GI Jew

Q: You know what's really funny? A: A good joke.

What did the father say to his child Christmas morning? you're adopted

Whats worse then a worm in your apple...... some of these jokes

Q:What's the difference between a lake? A: a tree, because motorcycles dont have doors... :) crf

A successful, articulate, charming, well mannered, rich, young man walks into a bar.... Every night

What's hotter than a woman who is face down and ass up? A woman who isn't tying her shoes.

I get more excited then my dog when I give her a treat

Roses are red, violets are blue, take this medication, and call me if you have any symptoms of nausea or heartburn.

How many cops does it take to screw in a lightbulb? None, they just beat the night since its black

Why is little johnny sad? He won the lottery but then found out the next day he had cancer and cried in a corner.

why was the little boy sad? because he had a frog stapled to his face.

What happened to The Guy when he got pissed on he was wet

How do you stop the neighbors from calling the police when you play your music too loud? Kill them and use their bodies as noise insulation

Why did the sloth swing from the tree? It hung itself.

This girl came up to me and said she recognized me from the vegetarian club. Her name was Jill.

Knock knock. Who isn't there? Not me. Don't come in. I won't.

What happened when Tim's house caught on fire? The fire department was contacted and they put the fire out.

What did the homeless black guy write on his sign? need money for weed.

Where can I find a good Prostitute? Your Parents House.

what do hookers and bungee jumping have in common? They are both 100$ to be in/on and if the rubber breaks your screwed

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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