Why did mallisa get to go to the bar instead of jeremy... jeremy has prostate cancer and he needs to be examined every 2 1/2 minuites plus he's 7 years old.

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What happened to the mentaly challenged person is walking down the street? He pooped on the sidewalk and got escorted to his house

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I love animals . But the ASPCA soon put a stop to that .

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Rose: Mom, why was I named Rose? Mom: Because when you were born a rose petal landed on your head. Rose: Than why is my brother named Brick? Mom: I liked the name.

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roses are red, violets are blue, I have schizophrenia, which is a serious mental disorder in which I have difficulty properly experiencing reality. It should not be confused with multiple personality disorder, which is a completely different disease with different symptoms.

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You know what makes me sick? Bacteria

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Have you seen the newest starwars? What movie? I mean that episode where stars fight... Will Smith vs Keanu Reeves? I am talking about the stars in the sky firing at each other! You know, those star pilots on planes... Flown by Will Smith and Keanu Reeves? BOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOM! (You heard that one in your head)

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A dyslexic walks into church and asks the priest. "Father is there a dog."

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whos gay and sits next to me? Griffen in my architecture class

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Why did the black basketball team beat the white basketball team? They practiced more

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Knock Knock. Who's there? Chicken. Chicken who? That's right.

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why did the bus roll down the hill? Children were playing in the street.

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Q.Why did Bruno Mars marry the blond? A.Because it was a beautiful night and he was looking for something DUMB to do.

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Twelve billion Nero, you puppy dog you hot blooded latino man. Why cant I control it myself?

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Did you hear the one about the pizza and the salamander? Neither did I.

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What's the difference between Republicans and Democrats? There is a series of boxes which one can choose to check on a ballot, officially registering an individual with a certain party. Available parties include the Green Party, The American Communist Party, The Republican Party, and the Democratic Party among others. Republicans choose to check the Republican box, Democrats choose to check the Democrat box. Also Republicans are closet homosexuals and Democrats are terrorists.

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How can you tell if a woman is stupid? Yell the word "STUPID'' and see if she turns around.

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Do you know what a zombie smells like? Death

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Why did the chicken cross the road? To get to the other side.

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What's do you call two bulls, a goat, and a horse? Farm Animals

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What did the nazi say to the jew? Nothing, he shot 'em

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What do you call a purple apple? Bruised.

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The Lord said to John: "Go forth and receive eternal life" But John went fifth... So he won a toaster

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How do you kill a blond? Stab her repeatedly in her throat

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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