A child is in class. He really has to go to the bathroom. The teacher tells him if he can recite the alphabet, he can go to the bathroom. The kid holds his breath and goes A B C D E F G H I J K L M N O P Q R S T U V W X Y Z. The teacher tells him good job and allows him to go to the bathroom. When the kid got there there was a man waiting in the stall who brutally raped and murdered the boy. when the teacher noticed the boy was gone for a long time, he went to check on him. When the teacher saw the dead naked body of the boy hanging from the ceiling, he shot himself. The teacher had a family of a wife and 3 sons. The principal of the school had to call the Wife and let her know about the tragedy. The principal also thought this would be a good time to tell the wife that her husband has been having a homosexual affair with him. The wife takes her three sons and drives off a bridge. They all die minus one son (age 14) who had to grow up on the street with other homeless men. He became addicted to crack and when he ran out of places to get money from he decided to rob his old home. He broke into the house and didn't know that a new family has moved in, a married couple and their 1 year old baby. He doesn't want to go to jail, so he kills the baby, spreads the blood all over the parents, ties the dad up and makes him watch his wife get raped, then he shoots the parents before putting the gun on himself. A police officer who responded to the scene had a heart condition and the scene of the crime caused him to have a heart attack. But, he got to the hospital in time and lived.

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Billy was taking a stroll in the forest, when suddenly he met a bear. Billy remember what his father had taught him, and quikly lied down on the ground, pretending to be dead. The bear started licking Billy's face. Still he remained calm. The bear bit off Billys finger. Still he did not move. When the bear ate Billy's foot, he nearly panicked. But thinking of his wife and children he mustered his last remaining strenght, and did not move a muscle. If he tried to run or fight the bear he would surely die and never see them again. Then the bear ate Billys head.

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jsahgfvdjfhgdehv? oiyduhgfdushy

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A man walks out of his house and sees a......BIRD!!!

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How do you confuse a blonde? Paint yourself green and throw forks at her.

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What did the Liver say to the Heart? Nothing, Organs can't talk

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Micheal Curran...that is all.

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why did the boat float up to the sky? because everybody on it died including the boat...

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Why was six afraid of seven? The world may never know.

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Why didn't Sarah come to school today? She had a heart attack and died.

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Why couldn't the pirate enter into the movie? Because he's dead.

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What's fat, gay, and ugly. A fat, gay, and ugly guy.

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When is it ok to drink urine? When you're Bear Grills

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How Dow you make a baby stop crying?? Hit it with a brick By smash45

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What's worse than finding a worm in your apple? AIDS

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How much cabbage is in sean's teeth? lots, like it's rotting in there

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There once was a student named Bob. Every morning he would rush to his job. But one day there was rain, He slipped in front of his train, There used to be a student named Bob.

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Why? Because.

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How are friends and bananas alike? If you peel their skin and eat them they die.

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why did the black man go to jail why he raped your mom

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Do you want to hear a joke, Women's rights

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What do a plum and a rabbit have in common? Their both purple. except for the rabbit

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Why didn't the skeleton go to the dance ? "because he had nobody to go with" No because it was dead.

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A mexican and a black man are in a car. Who's driving? the black man

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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