What did the computer say to the mouse? Nothing inanimate objects cant talk

thumb_up thumb_down -30

How do you make a Dead Baby Float..... ......With 3 scoops of ice cream and 1 cup of liquid stem cells.

thumb_up thumb_down -32

What is white and cannot jump? A refridgerator.

thumb_up thumb_down -32

What's the difference between a brick and a baby? One is a fundamental item used in building walls and the other is a human

thumb_up thumb_down -32

whats worse than getting bit by a tick. getting bit by a deer tick that as lyme disease.

thumb_up thumb_down -32

When the mom got home from work, she was very tired. Her 6 year old son asked her nicely to make him a PB&J sandwich. She said sure and made one. Her son was very pleased and ate all of it. He knew he had a great mom. I actually lied above. The mom was killed by three men in hoodies in her back yard. They came inside and also murdered to boy. Worst of all the killers stole all of her food including the rasberries the boy was looking forward to eat. I guess it doesn't matter now since he is unable to eat anymore...

thumb_up thumb_down -32

What happens when you finish a bottle of Sprite? You finish it

thumb_up thumb_down -32

Chuck Norris.

thumb_up thumb_down -32

Whats the difference between a giraffe and an elephant. Ones a giraffe and ones and elephant

thumb_up thumb_down -32

how do you remove a black man from a car? Wash the bumper

thumb_up thumb_down -32

What did the nun eat for breakfast? Baseballs.

thumb_up thumb_down -32

Why did the chicken cross the road? It felt like it, no particular reason. Why did the hippo cross the road? Same reason as the chicken. Why did the Fred cross the road? He was with animal control, and a chicken and hippo had just been reported to cross this dangerous stretch of highway.

thumb_up thumb_down -32

What's worse than 1 bee sting? Two bee stings. What's worse than two bee stings? The Holocaust.

thumb_up thumb_down -32

What did the white man say to the group of black men when there was a golf ball coming at them? Stay there! You are in no immediate danger!

thumb_up thumb_down -32

in·fun·dib·u·lum? 1. a funnel-shaped organ or part. 2. a funnel-shaped extension of the hypothalamus connecting the pituitary gland to the base of the brain. 3. a space in the right ventricle at the base of the pulmonary artery.

thumb_up thumb_down -32

Knock, Knock. Who's there? You're mom. It's your.

thumb_up thumb_down -32

Why was the black person playing hockey? Because he found an interest to the sport during his childhood years.

thumb_up thumb_down -32

Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? Because it was dead

thumb_up thumb_down -32

What's black and blue and made of poo? A drowning black guy, holding some blue poop

thumb_up thumb_down -32

Why do giraffes have long necks? So they can reach higher, un-eaten leaves.

thumb_up thumb_down -32

you: your adopted me: i was so thanks for saying you ass

thumb_up thumb_down -32

what do you call a fat black cat and a skinny white dog? Freckles and Spot

thumb_up thumb_down -32

How do you find a jew amoung italians? Through a dollar and see which one whines its not enough!

thumb_up thumb_down -32

Girl, why are you crying? I'm not a girl, I'm a strawberry.

thumb_up thumb_down -32

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops