What do you call a black man on the moon? An astronaut.

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What's Michael J Fox's favorite toy? While, a magic 8-ball might first appear to be a good guess. Let's be honest, those things really lose their luster after the first couple times. More likely it's something like a sports car or big screen television.

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Three men, a doctor, a lawyer, and a biker were sitting in a bar talking over a few drinks. After a sip of his Martini, the doctor said, "You know, tomorrow is my anniversary. I bought my wife a diamond ring and a new Mercedes. I figure if she doesn't like the diamond ring, then at least she will like the Mercedes, and she will know that I love her." After finishing his scotch, the lawyer said, "Well, on my last anniversary, I bought my wife a string of pearls and a trip to the Bahamas. I figured if she didn't like the pearls, then at least she would have enjoyed the trip, and she would have known that I loved her." The biker then took a big swig from his beer, and said, "Yeah, well for my anniversary, I got my old lady a t-shirt and a vibrator. I figured if she didn't like the t-shirt, then she could go f*** herself."

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what doesn't kill you makes you crippled for life because you lost use of your legs in a tragic car accident

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Patrick, I just thought of something funnier than 24. Lemme hear it. 25.

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why did victor sell half of club getaway because he wants a partner why did david buy the half because victors dying

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I love you, you love me. Barney is fat and not entertaining.

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A man walks into a bar the bartender looks at the man and says "Hey son you wanna make one hundred bucks?" the man looks at the bartender and says "Im not your son."

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What did the black man drink on a hot summer day? Some water, it quickly replenished the liquids he was perspiring do to the temperature being sufficiently hotter than his body temperature

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What did Batman say to Robin before they got in the Batmobile? Get in the Batmobile.

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What do you call literature that's depressing and hard to read? ...a valued part of the English curriculum

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Why doesn't Santa Claus like cantaloupe? Because he doesn't exist. You have to exist to like cantaloupe.

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Haikus are easy but some of them don't make sense but some of them do

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Who won the championship last year? There was no championship

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An airplane flies due north at 100 m/s through a 30 m/s cross wind blowing from the east to the west. Determine the resultant velocity of the airplane.

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why did the girl fall off the swing? because someone threw a fridge at her.

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What did the fat man say to everyone? Hey everyone! I am i fat man!

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How do you stop a bus? You try to wave down the bus driver, they're usually nice people who will stop for you if you put in some effort and act appreciative.

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why did little johnny start choking? because somebody shoved a bag down his throat

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what do you call a cross between lasagna and a human. weird

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A german police officer sees a Rabbi. Nothing happens, it's 2011

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What was the black guy doing in Mississippi? Just hanging around.

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A man rode into town on Friday and came out on Friday how did he manage this? He stayed for a couple of hours

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Why does Suzie like to wear sunglasses? Because she's blind.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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