Two peanuts are walking down the street. One of them was a salted Peanut

what has 2 legs and bleeds? Half a dog.

What did the banana say to the apple? We're fruity.

why was the baby crying? cause his abusive father broke his arm.

Why can't Helen Keller drive? Because she's dead.

What is my name? I dont know

Yo momma is so fat that she is at a high risk for heart disease and diabetes!

A Buddhist priest, and mexican drug lord, and a 12 year old girl walk into a bar. The bartender looks at the little girl and says. "Honey, you're too young to be in here." the little girl looks around and says. "Oh, My mistake." and leaves.

Felix? The Lucky cat? That is the only thing that comes to mind, I am dead tired, but I really don't mind staying up until I cant anymore physically, as for mentally I am getting pretty bad as for company.

what's inflation? a hollow cost.

Where do you guys find all these jokes? Your mom's Vagina

Why was six afraid of seven? The world may never know.

I rated up my joke then opened a new tab went to Anti-Jokes.com and rated it again. Problem antijokes?

Why was the young child dead in the middle of the road? His mother wasn't there to prevent him from chasing the ball across the road, and therefore, he ran in front of a truck

Do not be unreasonable now, as for the twenty five million dollars, it is the least I can do, but if we cannot agree upon acting with some reason and dignity, as refraining from insults, then no conflict will ever be solved... ...I will send you my contact information shortly, expect the money within the week, three or four days tops. Would you be interested in learning more about our order? We make good use of people such as you. With all due respect, I would not exactly lend my sister to anybody that brags about engaging into intercourse with his own sister.

Roses are red,violets are blue I've got aids & now so do you Merry Christmas

how do you confuse a blonde? ask if she wants a cake...then rape her

In a joke book: So a man walks into a bar. Suddenlly the universe around the author crack. Unable to sustain the infinite potential of punchlines, the author tumbles through an empty void amongst shards of his broken reality.

hey I just met you and this is crazy but get in my van

First speaker: "why are there so many anti-jokes about something walking into a bar!?!? Second speaker: "there are only a couple thousand of them." First speaker: "it is getting so damn annoying!" Second speaker: "Well, that's too bad for you" The first speaker proceeds in stabbing himself with a knife while laughing hysterecly. First speaker: "ha ha ha ha" Second speaker "emo."

jsahgfvdjfhgdehv? oiyduhgfdushy

What did the little boy with diabetes get for Christmas? A shot of insulin; just like every other day.

Why did the pot-head have red eyes? He got soap in them.

Why black people are so good at football? Because they have white feet.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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