Why was the asian boy abused? He got an B in math

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Why is Coldplay really big in Japan? They're tall guys.

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roses are red violets are blue i have 5 fingers the middle ones for you.

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Why did the Soviet plane crash? It was joseph Stallin in the air.

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guess what what ...

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Your momma is so fat, that she decided to sign up for weight-watchers, and is now on her way to a healthy life

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What's worse than a dead baby in a barrel? A dead baby in 8 barrels.

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What does a blond do when she stops at a red light? She gets arrested.

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Do you know whats funny? No do you know i was asking a question

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What is the cost of an abortion? 1 life

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I stepped into the bathroom and began to take a shower. Then, I panicked. I was so thirsty, and I did not take the advantage to drink some water before I stepped into the bathroom. But then I realized: "Wow, I am so silly. I am standing under the shower, so I could easily just expedite my washing and drying, exit the bathroom, get dressed, and grab something to drink from the kitchen!" Then I showered quickly and got something to drink.

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…What did you put in the drink that made me fart, and kill my horse?

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Have you ever tried Ethiopian food? No. Neither have they.

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an irishman an american and a jihadist get a plane were did they go right through my house

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what do you call lots of jews on a train? Call them what you want they aren't coming back!

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why did the girl moan in pain? she got punched in the face.

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Why am I writing this? Cuz I am eating babies alive right now!

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why did the man shoot himself in the foot? because he didnt have the safety on and he had no gun handling skills.

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On September 11th 2001, A worker of North twin tower man woke up to find his dog had chewed on his brand new phone. He went down stairs and realized his kitchen window had been broken. Getting ready to leave for work and saw his radio had been stolen out of his car. After finally making it to work and settling down in his office he spilled coffee on his lap. Enraged, the man yelled, "How could today get any worse!?"

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Q: why did the dog fall down the stairs? A: Because I pushed him down.

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A man with a badly injured arm is sitting in a hospital. He says, "Doctor, when my arm heals, will I be able to play the violin?" The doctor says, "Yes, with proper medical attention and rest, you will be able to." The man says, "That's great! Before I was hurt, I really enjoyed playing the violin."

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A: go away. B: No i won't A: Shutup B: Yes i will not go away A: again, shutup B: I left A: Thank you B: Your welcom A: Thank you for saying your welcome B: Thank you for saying thank you that i'm welcome A: Thank you for saying thank you for saying that I thank you that you're welcome.

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Q: Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? A: He had no arms Q: Why did the frog fall out of the tree? A: He was stapled to the monkey's face

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"Horse walks into a bar... Bartender says It's probably not a good idea that you're in here. You're a very large animal. Any sudden movements, you may injure somebody. I don't know why you're here. None of the glasses are ergonomically designed for you to drink from them. So, you should probably leave."

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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