What's big and green and I gets stuck in your teeth will kill you? A tractor

How do you make a fat man cry? You call him fat.

A blonde and a brunette jump off a building, who hits the ground first? The one that jumped first

Why don't Catholics allow people to wear condoms? Because they get stuck in the alter boys braces.

knock knock whos there? your dr you have cancer

the power to turn magnetism into light

How does Moses like his tea? Hebrews it.

If u read thus your awsome .... And if your a emo kid with rainbow hair and a 3 inch penis then NO your bad

What happed when the homeless shelter went out of business? -Everyone went hungry and died.

knock knock, whos there, isaac touch my titty

What do you call a black man standing on top of a church? "Holy-Shit."

Roses are red Violets are blue I would love you But you are too ugly and overweight

What do you find at a black guys yard sale? A bunch of reasonably priced items since he comes from a low income household.

Hey i just met you, and this us crazy! Heres some toilet paper, wipe my ass maybe?

What did one muffin say to the other muffin? Nothing, because they weren't made. Cupcakes were made instead. Sorry, Muffins.

Q: how do you drown a blond A: put a mirror at the bottom of a pool

How do you wake up your grandmother........ You don't, she had a massive heart attack and died in her sleep

What's worse then 1 bee sting? -2 Bee stings. What's worse then 2 bee stings? -The Holocaust. What's worse then the Holocaust? -3 Bee stings.

why was the mother sad? her sons school was bombed by terrorists. there we no survivors

are you saying pam, or pan?

An old man walks into a movie theater, has a stroke, and dies as his family screams for help and attempts to revive him to no avail.

your mommas so fat she jumped for joy and got stuck

What does a lonely man do on opposite day? I don't know. Why should we know what he does, that is both weird and illegal. Stalking is a serious crime and should not be used. We do not know what he does on normal days, thus we cannot come to a conclusion to this question. However, I do hypothesize that he must be social on this day because this is the opposite of lonely.

why did the chicken cross the road? because he was very hungrey and saw some seed on the other side.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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