What do you call a black man in a suit and tie? Presumably affluent

why did Lucy fall down? she got hit with a hammer

I went out for a nice evening with my wife last week, and we kept getting dirty looks because I'm 42 and she's 19. I get that people are a little weird about that for whatever stupid reason, but it totally ruined our tenth anniversary.

Q: Why did Jimmy not have balls? A: A terrible, terrible sand paper accident.

What's worse than 10 babies in a trashcan? One baby in 10 trashcans.

So a man walks into a bar. Unfortunately, he had brittle bone disease, cracked open his skull and bled to death on the pavement.

Roses are blue Violets are red I got this backwards Carpets are nice

The President, The Pope, and a small child are all in an airplane when the pilot announces that the plane is going to crash. They crash into the ocean and quickly remember that there is a life vest under their seats, which they promptly put on and safely inflate after exiting the cabin of the aircraft.

What does Chuck Norris order at McDonalds? A Big Mac with a large fry and drink.

Flowers are colors Love me

How do you make a blonde fall off of a cliff? You push her off of the cliff.

What's stupid a light bulb.

What do you get when you cross a penis with a dinosaur? A dicklodocus.

What did the black kid get for Christmas? An X-box, a sweater and some socks.

whats shaped like a tree. A tree.

what did the dog say to the mailman? "hey thanks for the mail" the mailman replies "your welcome"

What is the difference between a Ferrari and 1,000 babies? I don't have a Ferrari in my garage.

Wanna hear a hot headed retard? call and listen carefully 6196342668

Roses are red, Violets are blue, My grandmother has degenerative brain disease, We may need to euthanise her.

Q: What did osama bin laden say to the worker behind the gas station counter? A: May I buy this bag of chips?

What is green and drives around in the desert and is not a tank? secretly a tank

Roses are crimson. Violets are purple. I don't understand why this poem is so popular.

roses are red violets are blue I can't rhyme refrigerator

Roses are black Violets are black I would love to see A knife in ur back

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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