What's worse than finding a worm in your apple? Finding a worm in your penis.

thumb_up thumb_down +2

Fat? Jesse Z

thumb_up thumb_down +2

A dinosaur is walking down the street. He is soon confronted by a human. The human says to the dinosaur, "Hey, your a dinosaur." Which the dinosaur replies with, "Yes, yes i am." The dinosaur then stands there for a few seconds wondering why he is in the same time period as the human. And as to why a dinosaur would talk.

thumb_up thumb_down +2

Two muffins are sitting in an oven. The first one turns to the second, and says nothing, because muffins can't talk. They then both die because the temperature in the oven was 370 degrees.

thumb_up thumb_down +2

What's worse than seeing your grandfather dead on the floor? Seeing your grandmother standing over him with a knife

thumb_up thumb_down +2

Roses are red, Violets are Blue Last night was amazing, I have Aids

thumb_up thumb_down +2

What did the man say to his wife while having sex? I don't know.

thumb_up thumb_down +2

Friends are a lot like trees They fall down when you hit them multiple times with an axe

thumb_up thumb_down +2

2 moose sitting in a tree, suddenly there came a boat and landed in the tree next to them, then said one of the moose, he probably lives there

thumb_up thumb_down +2

A young Asian boy got a B on his test. He went home an showed his parents even though he was nervous of their reaction. They told him that a B was a good grade and put it on the fridge. After that he began to gradually flunk each class one by one because of his parent's inability to push him to be better. He is now homeless and an alcoholic.

thumb_up thumb_down +2

what is the opposite of 2x +3x?

thumb_up thumb_down +2

Why do deer have horns? Because god made them that way.

thumb_up thumb_down +2

What do you call a guy with a car on his head? Immediate identification would not be possible. The man would be referred to by his estimated demographics. Circumstantial evidence and dental reports may be required for identification at which points the family's would be notified. Only after this will the man's name would be released to the media who would in turn report this.

thumb_up thumb_down +2

Why did the fat man get thrown out of an all you can eat buffet? He molested a waitress

thumb_up thumb_down +2

A mother and her child run into the store... The mother opens the door, so the child does not run into the store again.

thumb_up thumb_down +2

Whats worse than forgetting your first homework assignment of the new school year? Being hazed on the first day of school to the point where you seriously consider suicide

thumb_up thumb_down +2

The man goes to the doctor after just losing his job because his company went under because of the econmic crisis. His house is being foreclosed because without the money from his job he can't afford to pay for his house. His girlfriend also just left him because of recent conflicts about money and she was looking forward to having a family and with him jobless it was just out of the question. Man:"Doctor I could really use some good news" Doctor:"You have aids"

thumb_up thumb_down +2

What's yellow and can't swim? A bulldozer.

thumb_up thumb_down +2

whats purple and attacks like a bear? a purple bear

thumb_up thumb_down +2

A priest, a rabbi, and a minister walk into a bar. The rabbi survives.

thumb_up thumb_down +2

what's the only thing funnier than a dead baby nailed to a tree? The look on the mom's face.

thumb_up thumb_down +2

Who pushed joe off the building? Nobody. joe hated his life and wanted to die

thumb_up thumb_down +2

why did the chicken cross the road? he was an escaped mental paitent

thumb_up thumb_down +2

A person tells an anti-joke. Nothing out of the ordinary happens.

thumb_up thumb_down +2

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops