An American, an Irish man, a Chinese man and a Black man walk in to a Bar, the Bartender takes their order

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Roses are red Violets are blue I hate rhyming Penis

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The horse walks into the bar and the bartender says, "why the long face?" the horse looks at him and says, "my wife just died."

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Roses are red, violets are blue, I got Alzheimer's! ...... Who the hell are you?

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Knock-Knock. Who's there? Cow that recognizes normal social cues and politely waits for its turn to speak. Cow that recognizes normal social cues and politely waits for its turn to speak who? Moo.

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Q:Where did sally go when the bomb went off? A: Everywhere.

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Life's like a box of chocolates it's shit if you have diabetes

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Roses are brown, Violets are brown, WHO THE HELL $#!T IN MY GARDEN?!

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Fact: Nine out of ten Americans believe that out of ten people one will always disagree with the other nine.

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Where did Jenny go after the explosion? Everywhere

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There are 11 people hanging onto a rope that comes down from an airplane. 10 of them are blonde, and one is a brunette. They all decide that one person should get off because if they don't, the rope will break and everyone will die. No one can decide who should go, so finally the brunette delivers a very touching speech, ending with the words, "I'll get off." The blondes, all moved by the brunette's speech, start clapping. Problem solved.

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An Asian man walked to P.F. Changs, and asked where the bathroom is.

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whats better than nailing a baby to a wall? Ripping it off the wall.

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Why did Sally fall off the swing? I hit her with a shovel.

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Why's worse than biting into an apple and finding a worm? Biting into a worm and finding a golden ticket

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What's brown and sounds like a bell? An old rusted bell.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? Who are we kidding, when have you ever seen a chicken crossing a road?

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Whats worse than biting into an apple and finding half a worm? Biting into another apple and finding the other half

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my penis

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Why did Bill correct Matt when he called him Jim? Because that wasn't his name.

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Why did the young girl fall off of the swing set? Because a man came up behind her and pushed her. He then picked her up, brought her home and fed her a nice three course meal and put her to bed. When she woke up she snuck out of the house and alerted the police.

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What's big and white and wilbkill you if it falls from a tree? My dick.

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-How do you wake up Lady Gaga? -Poke her face

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What's twelve inches long and makes women scream? Crib death.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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