In soviet russia, child molests you! Unfortunately true

whats worst than finding a worm in your apple???? an apple in your worm.

why did you poop because you are a poop

What do tomatoes, apples, oranges, lemons, and peaches have in common? They are all fruits.

How do you get a clown off a swing? Take a chainsaw and cut the swing in half

What do you call a dog with no legs? A seal.

Pacient: Doctor Doctor i think im becoming a vegetable... because of my heriditory bone marrow mutation

How big does your mouth have to be to eat a baby? How would i know, i'm not a canible.

What do lawyers and sharks have in common? They both play vital roles in their own society or ecosystem.

What's wet and sticky? I don't know, glue or something.

What do gamer see in his nightmare? a peasant build 4 houses and gets stuck between them.

Q: Men are always very careful to have penises. Why don't women care enough to have them? A: That's a very good question.

why was the woman in the kitchen? because societal standards placed her in such a situation

Why did Jack take a prune out for the evening? A healthy snack as part of a balanced diet.

Why did to plane crash because the pilot was a tomato

Why did the chicken cross the road? I don't know.

Oh NOES! She does worry about me! YOU MUST APOLOGIZE! Relax, the body has two sources of happy drugs, one is the sweet calm stuff I am really bad at, and the other comes with adrenaline and stuff, the name of which I do not remember, both are important, but yeah, I am a thrill seeker, and when I do not find them, I make a thrill out of whatever I got, whatever that means.

How do you hack into someone's computer? A few good hits with a hatchet should do the trick

nickel back

Yo momma so ugly, she couldn't fulfill her dream of being a model.

What do you get when you cross a pug and a beagle? A cross pug and a cross beagle.

Johnny Depp is Alexander Graham the whole time.

Why is the black guy afraid of the white guy? He's not, it's the other way around.

Paul walks on a bridge. It collapses.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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