Q: How are a plum and a rabbit alike? A: They're both purple, except for the rabbit.

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What is red and smells like brown feces? Bloody feces

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Why did the man open up a umbrella? Because it was raining..

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what is orange and sounds like a parrot a carrot

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why did bill gates sue his banks? Because he can

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Friends are like trees. They fall when hit multiple times with an axe.

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why was the asian kid the only one to get an A+ in the test? He spent the longest time studying and was therefore better prepared than the other students.

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What is blue and has wheels? A disabled Smurf!

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What do you call a black man who is flying a plane? A pilot.

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Two polar bears, oddly enough, are sitting in a bathtub. One of them asks "Could you pass the soap?" The other obliges and gives him the soap.

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no

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What did the horse say to it's owner? It didn't horses can't talk

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What's worse than dropping a dollar down the drain? Getting a needle shoved up your penis and it scrapes the insides of your balls open so that all of the sperm pours out of your balls and you are screaming in agony and you can never have children in the future.

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An eleven year old boy walks into a bar... he is searching for his father, who has a known alchol problem, and has been missing for five days.

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What is more difficult than trying to get blood from a stone? Trying to teach it Japanese in the process. [L]

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apple was gonna make a smaller ipod for kids but decided not to because they didnt want the name to be itouch kids.

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I cant believe they been together after all that shit. (person ask what) and you say your buttchheeeeks:]

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A young Asian boy got a B on his test. He went home an showed his parents even though he was nervous of their reaction. They told him that a B was a good grade and put it on the fridge. After that he began to gradually flunk each class one by one because of his parent's inability to push him to be better. He is now homeless and an alcoholic.

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"Ask me if I'm a tree!" "Are you a tree?" "No."

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yo mommas so poor she doesn't live in a house

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whats the difference between a European and a african an african has more pigment in his skin due to prolonged exposure to light

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What does the fox say? Nothing a fox is incapable of speech.

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Her hair was fine, her scent was great, now show me your fucking ****.......please

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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