How old are you? 7

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If life give you lemons, throw them at people.

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what did the duck say to the other duck Quack

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Roses are red, Violets are blue, What the **** did i just do? I have no clue......

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If you say "Hi" to every tree you pass, is that being environmentally friendly?

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Roses are shut the f*** up. Violets are shut the f*** up. Shut the f*** up. Shut the f*** up.

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what happens when steven hawking walks into a bar? everyone cheers at the miracle of science.

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Why did the little girl run to her mother? Because she saw a police inspector, who had already tried to kill her several times that week, aiming a poison dart at her forehead.

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What do gay horses eat? Horse dick.

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how do u make a snooker table laugh? TICKLE ITS BALLS HAHA

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How do you know when everybody on a plane crash is dead ? When your the only one who walked out

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What's an X-BOX? A box where you find a treasure

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A praying mantis is very graceful

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A carpenter walks into a bar. After ordering some wine he tells the bartender that one of his 12 friends will betray him. He also says that once he was captured, the government will execute him on a wooden cross for everyone to see. The bartender in disbelief says to the man "You gotta be kiddin' me, do you think you're Jesus or something?" The man throws his glass of wine to the floor, grabs the bartender by his collar, and says "Hey man, I ordered red wine, not white wine you bastard!" After a few minutes, a group of nurses escort the insane loon back to the mental clinic. The bartender never saw the man again and proceeds to sweep that mess the psycho left on the floor.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? To get to the other side. 97

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Bill: My vagina is itchy. Tom: You don't have a vagina. It was later found out that bill had a sex change and did have an itchy vagina, due to an STI. He later died of cancer.

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What did the little boy say to a stranger? Nothing. He is very shy, and his parents always said to never talk to strangers.

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Roses are red,violets are blue I've got aids & now so do you Merry Christmas

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A priest and a rabbi walk into a bar. The bartender says, "What is this? Some kind of joke?"

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The worst part of waking up, Is no Folgers in your cup.

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I really want to know something would all of you like to go on Suspension for 3 weeks? Mr Goodwin

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A baby seal walks into a club.

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A black man walks into a bar and orders a shot. He then precedes to drink it.

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Why did Billy fall off his bike? He tried to kill himself.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops