What do a tree and I have in common? We would both be mad if we got turned into paper.

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Have you seen stevie wonders house? neither has he.

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What's Green And Has Wheels? Grass, I Was Just Kidding About The Wheels.

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What do you call putting a toad in the microwave? Animal cruelty.

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What did Timmy's mom think of his art project? Nothing, she screamed and called an ambulance because she saw that he had tripped and fallin onto a pair of scissors and they just so happened to peirce his heart.

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Good job, son.

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Q: What did bulbasoar say to charmander? A: Bet ya thought I was gunna say Bulbasoar!!

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Q: Whats the difference between a Jewish man and a pizza? A: Jew's are humans and can feel emotions, as for pizza's can not feel emotions, because they are pizzas.

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why did the chicken cross the road i hate it when people ask questions they already know the answer to

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Why does Magic Johnson have to use extra-large condoms? Because he's got a giant dick and HIV.

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How do you get a baby to stop crying? Shoot it.

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Why are Asian people bad drivers? Coincidental cases of blurred vision.

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what is sticky and brown a black guys stick

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Customer Service "May I help you?" "Yes."

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Two muffins are in an oven. They say absolutely nothing because they're muffins and not sentient.

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How many feminists does it take to screw in a light bulb? Two. One to screw in the light bulb and one to suck my dick.

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Yo momma is so ugly that shes been taking self acceptance classes for her very low self esteem which is only one of many side affects shes had from years of bad relationships and being told she was and infact still is horrifically ugly its a truly sad thing and being the child of her you should be ashamed that you have not worked to help raise her self esteem

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How many kids does it take to get a day off of school? ...26

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EVERYONE, CREATE LOVE NOT WAR.. Between Josh and Dylan... WILD.. PASSIONATE.. LOVE!

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A duck walks into a bar, clearly ignoring the 'No Ducks Allowed' sign that had been placed in the window to prevent comedic scenarios.

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What's black, white and red all over? A nun that fell down a flight of stairs

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What did one cow say to the other? Moo.

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Why can't dinosaurs talk? Because they're all dead

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Roses are red, violets are blue I've got Alzheimer's cheese on toast

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops