Humpty Dumpty sat on a wall Humpty Dumpty had a great fall, He cracked his skull and died on impact. He will be missed.

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What has straight black lines and is square? A refferee.

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kkkk

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why did the hobo want cancer so badly? he really needed a haircut

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What's worse than a dead baby inside a microwave? A microwave inside a dead baby.

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What does it mean when the drummer drools out of both sides of their mouth? That they've may have had a stroke and you should immediately call 911.

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One day, 2 people were gonna fight after school and then the final bell rung. The fight began and the challenger says, "Hey whats the one thing you say when you don't want to fight anymore and you let the other person win?" The other guy says to the challanger, "I give up?" Then the challenger yells. "I WIN!"

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6 in every 9 people find a dirty reference in every joke. This statistic is in fact false, as 5 in 9 people actually find a dirty reference.

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i put a oie in the oven, it baked

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Q: how do u make a fireman cry? A: set his wife on fire

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Why did the giraffe fall over? Because I shot it with a bowling ball cannon,

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How do you fit 100 Jews in a car? You can't

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Why did Susie fall off the swing? Because she has no arms. Why did the baby fall off the swing? Because i hit it with a bat.

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What did the banana say to the apple? Nothing, although on a deoxyribonucleic acid level, bananas are technically sharing 50% of their genes with us, humans, but yet still have the incapability to produce its own voice. In addition, apple can't talk either due to their lack of nerves, veins, arteries, and diaphragm, therefore bananas not apple cannot produce sound.

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What kind of horse can do a backflip? No kind of horse.

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Why is the old lady crying? I threw a fridge at her.

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Q: What's worse than finding out yor girlfriend is a guy? A: He had sex with your dad.

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Whats the worst thing about dying? Your not alive anymore.

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Bill: Hey Bob guess what? Bob:What? Bill: your adopted

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knock knock Dave's not here.

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Roses are grey, Violets are grey, Everything's grey, I'm a dog.

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A man walks into a bar and breaks his nose, he asks the bartender for help The bartender says "no you're a f***ing idiot"

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Knock knock Who's there? To To whom? No, its To Who now, since I married

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A: Why did the chicken cross the road? B: Why? A: If I knew I wouldn't be asking you.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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