Why did the dead baby cross the road? It was stapled to the chicken.

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Why did the stoner visit anti-joke.com? Because he was bored, and probably kinda high.

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What did Rachel (the columbine girl) get for her birthday?? Nothing she's dead.

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so a boy walks into a bar he was underage and escorted out.

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Something other than a Human Being walks into a bar. The bartender then makes a rational decision about how to handle the situation.

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How do you kill a blonde? Drench her in fluoroantimonic acid and watch her explode in a violent and gruesome death.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? It didn't, it got hit by a bus on the way over.

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roses are red, violets are blue, penis

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Wanna hear a joke? Me neither.

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Why did the old woman put roller skates on her rocking chair? She had dementia.

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what did the farmer say when he lost his tractor? wheres my tractor

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why dont i play socker because im not waering socks

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What's worse than finding a worm in your apple? The loss of originality in anti joke formats. And hypocrisy.

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What did one penguin-necrophiliac say to another penguin-necrophiliac? Nothing. Penguins cant talk.

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What the hardest part of a vegetable to eat? The wheelchair.

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What did the little asian boy get for his birthday? To work for minimun wage making high quality shoes for greedy white people in North America who dont care about anybody but themselves.

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i dont fisish anythi

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Q: Human being? A: False. Jew.

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Want to hear something funny? Sure, what? 9/11

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What did the Atheist say in church? His best friend's eulogy.

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Why was the sock sad? Impossible. Socks dont have emotions.

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What did the blind man say when you asked hi his favorite color? Nothing he is death too

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How do you get 100 midgets into a Mini? You have to manufacture a Mini large enough to accommodate 100 midgets. It wouldn't be street-legal, but at least the problem of getting 100 midgets into a Mini is solved

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My Texting Convos: "Heyy!" "Hi!" "Watz up?" "nm hbu?" "Same here!" "Koolio!(: So wrud?" "Nothing. Just texting you!" "Yea! Same! I'm so bored! And tired!" "Ikr!" "Yupp!" *No one answers. When this is what you really want: "I love you soooo much!" "Awwwwh!<3 I loe you too!" "Do you wanna go out?(;" "YES!!(:" "ily<3" "iyl2<3" *convo goes on forever(: Moral: Purple tomatoes are books of yellow buttons on hands(;

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops