Barack Obama and a kangaroo pull up to a gas station. The gas station attendant takes one look at the kangaroo and says, "You know, we don't get many kangaroos here." Barack Obama replies, "At these prices, I'm not surprised. That's why we need to reduce our dependence on foreign oil."

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In class a teacher said "Stand up if you think you'r stupid" A kid stands and the teacher ask why? The kid said: "Oh I thought it'd be a bit fair since your standing up.

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Billy wanted a toy for Christmas. Sadly, Billy died before Christmas.

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Q: How do you measure a ruler A: You don't.

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How do you offend a black man? Call him a nigger.

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How do you confuse a blonde? Tell her to jump over your car, then drive by in a truck

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Why does a new mother have big jugs? Her baby died of Sudden infant death syndrome.

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What's worse than seeing your grandfather dead on the floor? Seeing your grandmother standing over him with a knife

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what happened when steven hawking's date stood him up? he feel down

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How did the Jew survive the holocaust? He didn't, he died.

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A man walks into a bar. Three weeks later he gets a liver transplant.

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So a guy says to his dog "hey man when you piss in the toilet can you please flush, just because I don't like to look at your pee." then the dog sits back and says "...woof !!"

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osama is obame quincadence or aluminatti????

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What did the archangel Michael say to Jesus? "Hello, Jesus."

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What did the woman say to the black man in bed Good morning honey

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When life gives you Pure Filtered Water, Sweeteners (High Fructose Corn Syrup, Sugar), Lemon Juice from Concentrate, Less Than 0.5% of Each: Natural Flavors, Citric Acid (Provides Tartness), Modified Cornstarch, Glycerol Ester of Wood Rosin, Sodium Hexametaphosphate and Sodium Benzoate and Potassium Sorbate and Edta (to Protect Taste), Red 40 Make Lemonade.

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What's the difference between your dog and your mother? Your dog doesn't think you're a disgrace to the family

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Why did the chicken cross the road? It is hard to know things like that.

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Hey ask me if i'm a train? Are you a train? No...

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Q: what's worse then stubing yout toe? A: getting raped by godzilla

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What did the fat man eat for breakfast? Nothing, he died of heart failure in the night.

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Have u ever noticed why a Police car siren isnt as loud as an ambulance siren? Do u know why that is? Because i dont, and i would like to know because my over active and curious brain is pounding through my skull and throbbing with question and wont stop until i know the answer!

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Roses are OK, Violets do the trick, C'mon and let me whip out my Dick.

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What do you call a man with a horse? A man

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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