What do you call a duck playing a trombone? Hallucinations

Como estan lo que sienta in el tarea de tomo caliente? A. Los sientos! ~ this is why nobody likes Spanish

What starts with 'd' and ends in 'ick'? dick -XH

a pope and priest walk into a bar what's the first thing they say? OUCH my head

Why did the chicken cross the road? He was being raped and was fugitive lot trying to escape, to no avail.

The speakers on my computer were broken, so I was going to replace them with John Boehner. Because he is the SPEAKER of the house.

What did the radiator say to the carpet? Nothing, a radiator is an inanimate object, and therefore is unable to speak.

What is black, tastes like crap, lands in a toilet, feels soft and mushy, sometimes red, blue, yellow, purple and pink, feels very heavy. eats cookies, drinks soft drink and lights fires? A fat person in a coloured suit.

I EAT YOUR SOUL. NOM NOM.

What's the difference between Jews and pizza? God likes pizza

A horse, a duck, a pig, and an arab walk into a bar. The horse ducks, the duck's hoarse, the pig's in a blanket, and the arab has a can, being surprised at how far a can can preach hate in Chicago. The bartender reminds the arab that he's with a swine, and the arab is offended for the poor horse.

Why did the black man cross the road? he just wanted to cross the road, racist. ... after he had robbed a bank

One night, I walked into a bar. I ordered a few drinks, and left later that night.

knock knock who's there boo Jenny had a heart attack due to the scare, she was taken to hospital and died

Why did the pig jump over the farmer? Because he's a stupid idiot.

LO LLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOOPLOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOOLLOLOLOLOLOLOLOOO O O O O O O OLO LOL OL O LO LO LO L OL -LOL GUY

Why can't Hellen Keller drive? She was too tired and was afraid that if she got behind the wheel it might cause her to fall asleep at the wheel which would result in an accident.

there once was a little boy who lived in a little house with his little parents who ate little food. one day the boy went on a website called antijokes and he started to read a joke, by the time he had gotten to the end of the joke he realized that there was no punchline but it was very lenghty and quite pointless.

What do you call an asian women running for president? A candidate.

cory is gay

whats the difference between a grape and an elephant? the grape is purple

What's sad about a guy jumping off a cliff? The cliff.

What's the worse part about a Jewish man dying in a house fire? It was his birthday

Whats Worse that 10 babies stapled to 1 tree? 1 Baby stapled to 10 trees

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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