What's the difference between a sack of dead babies and my cousins? Nothing.

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A dog is always in the pushup position.

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What happened when the chicken got to the other side of the road? It didn't, it got hit by a car.

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Women are only good for seventy-one things: Love A proper home to come home to everyday 69

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there are seven of us," reply the babies, "now get us a round of bloody marys

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Why did the jew go into the gas chamber? Because he thought he was going to get a shower.

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A man is watching a football game and sees a comercial for a medicine that boosts testosterone levels. However, this man has no issues with his testosterone levels, so he proceeds to watch the rest of the game and then goes to bed.

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Man 1: Ask me if im a flower Man 2: "are you a flower?" Man 1: if i was a flower do you think i could talk? man 1 was wondering why man 2 was so uneducated

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Why did the plane crash? Because the pilot was a loaf of bread.

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Why was the Tyrannosaurus Rex such an aggressive animal? it had short arms so it could not masturbate.

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DON’T HIT KIDS!!! NO, SERIOUSLY, THEY HAVE GUNS NOW. Via: Pingzic collection of Funny WhatsApp Status

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what's black and white and red all over? nothing... it's red

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There was a blonde driving a car but she was late to a meeting so she started speeding but then a police officer pulls her over. The officer asked the blonde "Do you know how fast you were going?" to which the blonde responded "Yes, I am late to a meeting" so the police gives a ticket for speeding and she ends up going late to her meeting.

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What did the Jew say to the Catholic? Nothing. He is a mute you insensitive moron!

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George Bush told Jared Fogle that he did 9/11. Jared Fogle replied "I did 9 11 year olds"

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Jack, John, Justin, Joseph and Jimmy walk into a bar. They order a pint of beer and start wondering what their names have in common.

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what did the pumpkin muffin say to the blueberry muffin? nothing, because muffins can't talk.

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Why can't Elvis Presley drive a car backwards? Because he's dead!

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Three men walk into a bar. The first guy bought two drinks, the second guy bought three drinks, can you guess what the third guy bought? A tazer.,

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How does a guy with no arms kill himself? It's called murder.

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What did the kid with no arms and legs get for Christmas? A: Cancer

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i did a 360 noscope, then i jizzed. from dylan

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3 black guys walk into a restaurant and they sat down, ate their meals, and even tipped the waitor handsomely then for about 10 minutes they talk and then leave restaurant. Soon after a white guy comes and holds up the place for all it's money then killing three hostages before being taken down by the police.

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Last Christmas I gave you my heart. I am still waiting for a transplant.....

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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