Q: Why did Jimmy not have balls? A: A terrible, terrible sand paper accident.

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Q: How does 5 gay people walk together? A: In One Direction.

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Boy 1: What comes after L? Boy 2: Elephant, elbow, elk, elementary, Elliot, Elder Scrolls? Boy 1: No. Boy 2: What is the answer? Boy 1: M

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What is long hard and woody? A tree.

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caoimhin you satan of CHRIST IM A DICIPLE OF CHRIST UNLIKE YOU

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What did farmer brown say when he lost his tractor? Where is my tractor?

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A bartender walks into a bar. About 8 hours later, he goes home.

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What happends when two gay guys want to have kids? They can't, so they go to an orphanage and adopt one.

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If you are swimming in a tree how many dogs does it take to crack a duck? The answer is 4 because nothing rhymes with orange

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YOU

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Knock knock Who's there? Chicken Chicken who? I can't believe you're talking to a chicken

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what happened to the retarded dyslexic? he retard on his 60th birthday and took up gardening.

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Why did the hobo break both of his arms? He didn't like them.

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A man walks into a bar, he realizes his mistake and walks into the dentist next door where he had made an appointment to get his teeth cleaned.

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What happened when the boy got caught with his hand in the cookie jar? He gets shot in the face by Santa.

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what can jump higher than a tree? anything that can jump because everyone knows that trees cannot jump.

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Q. What did the Muffins say to the man? A. Nothing, muffins are inanimate objects therefore unable to speak.

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Why couldnt dylan make it to mike's birthday party? He was killed instantly in a car crash on the way there.

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What's purple and has four legs? I don't know. What? I DONT KNOW EITHER THAT'S WHY I'M ASKING YOU IN THE FIRST PLACE!

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What's white and can't jump? A fridge.

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Connor is homosexuaI

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A student goes up to the teacher because he has to go to the washroom. The teacher tells him that he has to sing the ABC's before he can go. So the boy sings, "ABCDEFGHIJKLMNOPQRSTUVWXYZ." The teacher said he did a perfect job and could go to the washroom. The boy went on to become a billionaire. Congrats!

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What's the difference between Paris Hilton and a cow? Cows are ruminants, meaning that they have a digestive system that allows use of otherwise indigestible foods by regurgitating and rechewing them as "cud". Paris Hilton, on the other hand, is a human being. Therefore, her stomach digests the bolus (masticated food) only after it has exited the oesophagus into the body of the organ, where it is digested into chyme and then passed through the pyloric sphincter into the duodenum.

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How many cops does it take to change a lightb- [Beaten to death by cops]

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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