Knock knock. "Whose there?" "Dave" Oh alright Dave, two seconds I have got to unlock the door~looks for and finds keys and unlocks door~ Hello Dave, sorry mate not been out yet so not been out, come in.........

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Why did the janitor commit suicide? He was sick of people's shit.

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What does a casino have in common with a woman liqur in the front, and poker in the back

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A man walks into a bar gets drunk gets in his car and has a terrible crash because he was to intoxicated the end.

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Man: Did it hurt? Woman: huh? Man: Did it hurt when i killed your family?

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That awkward moment when a loved one dies.

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roses are red violets are blue i have Alzheimers but at least i do not have Alzheimers

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Q.why did the monkey fall out the tree? A. it was dead Q. why did the second monkey fall out the tree? A. it was hanging onto the first one Q. why did the third monkey fall out the tree? A. peer pressure

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why did the man fall down? because he was shot.

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What do you get when you mix a Refrigerator with a dog? Nothing. That would be impossible.

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Roses are red Violets are blue i suck at poems nice titz

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A black guy and a white girl are having sex. The white girl screams "I'm pregnant!!!!" The black guy says "i'll help you take care of it" "I love you sweetie and nothing will come between us"

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How do you get out of a car with only a baseball bat and a hammer? Unlock the door.

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What the hardest part of a vegetable to eat? The wheelchair.

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You know who else sucks dick? My aunt Jane. She was forced to become a prostitute after she got fired from her job.

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What happened to the vegetarian when he tried outdoor survival He died due to lack of energy because of his refusal to eat meat and or any living substance

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What starts with P and ends with ORN? Popcorn! What starts with F and ends with UCK? Firetruck! What starts with S and ends with EX? Spandex!

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A man was struck by lightning. What did you think he got super powers or something? No. He died a horrible death

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why did the chicken cross the road? it wanted to why did the bubble gum cross the road? it was on the chickens foot

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What killed the dinosaurs? THE ROCKET POWERED FIST!!!

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A couple picks up a hitch-hiker with an ax on the side of the road. The hitch-hiker says "Thank you for the ride."

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What's Gay and has a penis? Justin Bieber, I lied about the penis

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How does God choose who goes to heaven? I'm just kidding, there's no God.

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What's worse than dying in a car wreck with your family? You being the only one that dies.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops