Q: why did the chicken cross the road A: you are adopted

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Q: How do you make a plumber sad A: you kill his family lolololololololololol

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Why did the chicken cross the road? Exercise

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Yo momma's so stupid... she scored poorly on on the SAT, failed to get into a good college, worked at a walmart and lived an otherwise mundane life.

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Knock Knock Who's there? Jim Come on in!

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A kid goes to the doctor and says, "Doctor! it hurts when I do this!" The Doctor says, "Well, because you have been diagnosed with ALD, and to make matters worse you are allergic to rapeseed oil" The child then cries because he will never live past 40 years old

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Why didn't the sperm cell cross the road? It died from the intense heat.

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How would I re-arrange the alphabet? I would place P in your butt...

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Your mom is so fat she probably has a body mass index of between 25 and 30 which is considered to be "overweight" but paradoxically is associated with fewer health risks by medical professionals.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? He was attempting to get back to his farm.

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Your uncle jack just helped you off a horse. Now it's your turn to help your uncle jack off a horse.

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Your big dick.

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An armadillo walks into a bar, and shouts "I hear you don't serve armadillos." "That is correct," the bartender replies.

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A man walks into a psychiatrists office with a banana in his ear. The psychiatrist says, why do you have that banana in your ear. The man says, "What?" The psychiatrist says, "I said, 'Why do you have that banana in your ear?" The man says, "What?" The psychiatrist shouts, "I SAID, WHY DO YOU HAVE THAT BANANA IN YOUR EAR?" The man says, "Sorry, I can't hear you, I'm deaf." (props- Marty Smith)

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i am iron man running over fat kids in my van

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Whats gay, has a nice ass, and can such a mad dick? Everyone at LNS, including me, Glenn. Just kidding I like bitches.

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What did the boy with no legs get for his birthday? A bike

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Whats worst then getting a paper cut. Being stabbed by a screw driver.

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Q. Why did the man die? A. Natural Causes

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why couldnt the man run because he had no legs

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Why did the Japanese man fall down the stairs? He was blind and deaf and not aware of his surroundings to prevent himself from doing so.

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How does a black man spell Jack J-A-C-K

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Roses are red, Bacon is brown, this poem makes no sence, BACON!!

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Roses are red Violets are blue Sugar is sweet And this poem sucks

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops