whats worse than a worm in your apple..? getting shot..

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Why did the goose cross the road? Because the chicken was on vacation

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What happened when the little girl said Bloody Mary 3 times in the dark? - She got her head smashed in the mirror, all of her intestines were neatly ripped out and was stabbed to death with No.2 mechanical pencils. Then her parents came home from dinner to find their daughter brutally killed in her own room. They notified police, opened a case and gave up after 12 years of searching for her killer. Both parents cried for the amount of years their daughter had been gone and they both decided to kill each other. The father raped the mom while slitting the back of her neck that led to her head being detached. Then the father left his pick up truck running and through his head toward the engine, which didn't really work. So he went back inside and watched Three and A Half Men.

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How many ants are in the kitchen? None. We killed them all.

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Have you ever treat woman like sandwich? Elephant and walrus said Jews are troubles. If six plus nine is five, chickens will eat you, saturdays.

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Why is the mexican navy so bad? They have insufficient funds to give to their military as they are a 2nd world country.

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Stop looking at these jokes and go fuck yourself.

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Eddie Murphy's recent film career.

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roses are blue, violets are red. I am color blind

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Why did Susie fall off the swing?? ShE had no arms. Knock knock... Whose there? Not Susie

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Your mum's so fat, she should probably consult her local GP to insure she doesn't die of a cardiac arrest.

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Why did Mr. Cannon dies Because he got shot as an undercover cop in south america

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A man walked into a bar....he's OK.

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Next time someone says "I have mad money"... Say "whys it mad"

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Q. Why was 6 afraid of 7? A. Because 7 was a scary dude.

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Who doesn't love finding money in your pocket when you go to put your pants on? a rape victim

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How do you confuse a blonde?? Throw her in a circle room and tell her to find all the corners If she comes out and says I found the corners.. then your screwed

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Why was 6 afraid of 7? Because 7 is a wanted serial killer on the run from the police

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Q: Wanna hear a dirty joke? A: A kid fell in the mud.

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Help me I need to know how to cook a human fetus by tomorrow does anyone know any good recipes?

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Do you know what a zombie smells like? Death

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Friends are a lot like trees I just thought you should know.

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Q:How many pieces of paper can one tree make? A:Trees cannot make paper, people make paper from trees. So the answer is none, a tree can't make any paper whatsoever.

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So the question i got asked in order to post this was: Which one is easiest? and I thought to myself, the slutty one, obviously!!

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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