What had 82 eyes, 7 mouths, and sings the blues? Nothing, the described creature does not exist.

What falls down but never gets hurt? A professional stuntman wearing protective gear.

Knock Knock Who's There The police, your under arrest.

What do you get when you mix a bulldog with a shitzu? One delicious smoothie.

What' worse than random Holocaust jokes? The Holocaust

Whats bent but straight for danielle? Joseph Plummer

You know what's worse than having friends with a lake houses Not being invited to their lake house...

How meny Jews can you fit in an ash-tray? None. There to big

Last night I had a lovely chicken burger I had no mayo left so had to make do with coleslaw but enjoyed it anyway.

Why arent guys and girls the same? Cause there different

Whats the difference between Megan Fox and a dead baby? Megan Fox is alive

What's worse than finding a worm in your apple? Finding a worm in your BANANA.

Mila Kunis is fugly. Said no one ever.

There is a law in california that says that women are not allowed to drive with house coats.

Why did the squirrel fall out of the tree? Because it was dead. Why did the second squirrel fall out of the tree? Because it was stapled to the first one. Why did the third squirrel fall out of the tree? Because it thought it was a game. Why did the tree fall over? Because it thought it was a squirrel.

What's small, white, and it killed Bruce Lee? Aspirin.

Roses are blue, Violets are purple, I like chicken. Do you like chicken?

I just wrote three jokes on antijoke.com ... nope, make that four.

Roses are read Vliolets are bloo I cant spell How about you

What did the little calculator grow up to be? Nothing

-What's the difference between Michael Phelps and Hitler? Michael Phelps can finish a race.

A: Ask me if I am an Orange. B: "Are you an Orange?" A: No.

What did the man do when he crossed the road? Nothing he got hit by a car

Why was the Mexican man in the rich man's garden? Because he enjoys flowers.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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