Stevie Wonder valentine: Roses are black, Violets are black, everything is black, I cant see shit!

Math Problem: John has 32 candy bars. He eats 28 of them. What does he have now? Diabetes. John has diabetes.

What's worse than having AIDS? A piano falling on your left middle finger.

Roses are red violets are blue I'm gonna rape you with a stick

you that read wrong no you typed it wring my mind just rearranged the words to make grammatical sense

What benefits came from the September 11th attacks? None. It was one of the most horrific tragedies in American History

How many tickles does it take to make an octopus laugh? Ten tickles

A bloke runs into the bank, says to the girl "Stick 'em up!" She says "Righty-o, matey" and sellotapes his bollocks to the ceiling.

What's worse then finding a worm in your apple? Women's Rights

Roses are red, violets are blue if God makes us beautiful, Who made you?

Why did the stereo break? Cause little Johnny threw a bat at it.

Why did the student fall asleep during class? He was very tried from staying up too late.

Did you hear about the three Arabs that hijacked a plane? They drove it into the Pentagon.

Why did the kid fall? He got pushed off of a building

Q. What's cold and has no feelings? A. A pole

Why did Suzy have burns on her face? Because her little brother attacked her with a hot curling iron thinking it was a lightsaber.

What do you call a black man driving a plane? You don't call it anything. You don't drive a plane you fly it.

Knock knock! Who's there? Alzheimer's Alzheimer's who? To get to the other side!

nick walked into macdonalds... everyone stood up and left as they saw the potential danger in the situation.. nick later ended up bieng hit by a bus after chasing a duck

A:You wanna here a good anti joke B:Yeah/sure A:Me too

Knock Knock Who's there? You You Who? Yes? Can I help you madam?

How many babies can fit in a dumpster? Let's not find out...

What do you call a woman with one leg shorter than the other? Whatever her name is.

Q. How do you drowned a blond A. Put a scratch and sniff at the bottom of a pool

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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