a priest and a rabbi are walking down a road together the rabbi says: so your a priest how about that the priest says: fine ive read the bible a few times good book

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If you add two 1's together its 11 if you add two 2's together its 22 If you add two 3's together its 33 So what happens if you add 4 and 4? No you dumb-ass its not 44, its 8

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What did the cat say when someone pointed out that cats can't talk? Meow.

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IKR! and I hear rondo and wade were in a fight too!

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Knock knock. Who's there? Your bipolar aunt so don't ask again.

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I used to have a shirt just like yours, except it was green. And it was a bicycle.

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What did steve do when jane asked him for a pencil? He gave her one.

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Why can't Helen Keller drive? She is both blind and deaf, and doing so would put others in danger.

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Little Jack Horner sat in a corner eating a Christmas pie. He died the next morning because it was Easter and the pie had remained unrefrigerated since the holidays. His parents were brought up on charges of neglegent homocide. Plus, they had a meth lab in the guest bathroom and ran a prostituion ring off of Craig's list. Jack's sister is now in the care of loving foster parents,who plan on adopting her and she misses her brother. Easter is a sad reminder of her former life, even though she is now a devout Christian and acknowledges the day as that of our Lord's ressurection. She plans on going to college to study nursing, someday.

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A horse trots into a bar. He is left with a bump on his head.

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Why was Uncle Monty's head damn tasty? Because he shoved it up a horses arse when it needed a shit.

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Why do blonde girls like penis? Because it tastes good

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Roses-are-red violets-are-blue Justin's-for -me Not-for-u if-by-chance u-take-my-place I'll-grad-fist &-smash-ur-face

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Q: why did the dog fall down the stairs? A: Because I pushed him down.

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Why did Susie fall off the swing? Because she had no arms. Knock knock Whos there Not Susie What did Susie get for Christmas? I don't know , she never opened it. Who high fived Susie? No one Why did Susie die? She got shot in the face

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There was a scientist that was doing a social experiment with mothers and their children. The name of first kid was named candy because it was her mothers favourite thing. The second kid name was rose because it was her mothers Favourite thing. The last mother knew what was happening and said to her son "Come on Dick".

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Why did the man drink a glass of water? Why not?

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How long did it take Jeff, a middle-aged man with a lifelong speech-destroying lisp, to overcome his impediment? Less than ten minutes, as carbon monoxide is a colorless, odorless toxic gas that eliminates oxygen at a rapidly-acting rate inside of small areas such as the car Jeff locked himself inside.

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Why did the spy cross the road? To get to the other hide.

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A black man walks into a bar holding a weapon. He is asked to leave to leave because weapons are not allowed in the bar.

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What is hitlers favorite planet: jewpiter

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It's caoimhin I wasnt writing cos kane turned my computer off the bel end aodhans been tuping sayin its be the spa.

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What's worse than a fake bomb? Do I really have to answer that?

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Why did a white man get kicked out of the Olympics 2012¿ Because he did not have down syndrome

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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