What do you call a guy with a car on his head? Immediate identification would not be possible. The man would be referred to by his estimated demographics. Circumstantial evidence and dental reports may be required for identification at which points the family's would be notified. Only after this will the man's name would be released to the media who would in turn report this.

how much wood could a wood chuck chuck? 3

A baby seal walks into a bar. Animal services are called and the seal is returned to its natural habitat. A man then beats it dead with a blunt object.

Womens Sports

Teacher: Be creative and original! Student A: Teacher, why do you want us to change our monikers? I'm fine the way I am. After all, I'm unique... just like everybody else... Teacher: Why don't I have the brilliant children? Student B: Chance/randomness plays a large part in our everyday lives. Take for example the life of Bob- a paragon for human normality. He gets up in the morning each and every single day to be greeted by an arbitrary occurrence. Although it sometimes serves Bob good, it could also aggrandize his human well of detriment. Teacher, do you want me to continue? Teacher: I retract my earlier statement. Some of the children are brilliant, but most are not. Hence I'm going to say that I have a normal class of students. Student B: Teacher, you didn't answer my last question of which I addressed to you specifically.

What do you call an Iraqi man steering the plane? a pilot, you racist.

knock knock who's there? Tommy Tommy who? Tommy Smith from across the street, i just ran over your dog.

What did the man say to the other man? yummmmm

Knock knock. Who's there? The landlord. You're being evicted.

How do you stop an assassin? Kill their target

Ever tried Ethiopian food? Neither have they.

Whats worse than finding a worm in your apple? Finding a snake in your liver. Because that could be hazardous to your health.

What's 6+2? 16

How many licks does it take to get to the center of a tootsie pop? I don't fucking know.

a horse walks into a bar and the bartender says "why the long face" the horse says "my son was just diagnosed with multiple sclerosis"

How do you stop a baby from drowning? Take your foot off its head.

9/11.

Your momma's so stupid, her IQ is below average.

what did the boy with no arms or legs get for christmas? a bike

How many blondes does it take to screw in a lightbulb? Doesn't matter, the lightbulb was never out

Winking at old people

mitt romney

What's worse than forgetting how to spell? asghasonbma.

A Man visits his Doctor because he is feeling slightly unwell.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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