I have 13 hedge hogs in one hand and 4 pineapples in my van how many pikelets does it take to cover the roof. Purple because aliens dont wear hats.

what is the difference between jelly and jam? jelly is smoother where jam has chunks of fruit in it...... and i cant jelly my penis down your throat

What's worse than finding a worm in your apple? Finding out your Grandmother died.

Hey, is that your corvette. No I thought it was yours.

a naked man walks into a bar. he is promptly escorted out because you must have shoes and a shirt to be served

What is faster? A bottle of milk or a sand-filled pin ball machine? A fighter jet, stupid!

A horse walks into a bar. He called him Arthur. Those are two sentences.

Suck my bigvagina you faggetass bitchybuns

Knock knock! Who's there? Joe Barkley. Joe Barkley who? ...

Why did the pengoon cross the road? It was stapled to the chicken

Hey Patrick what am i ? Ebola No im Texas! What's the difference?

What do an eagle and a mole have in common? They both fly, except for the mole.

What's the difference bettween the holocaust and a bee, 6 million jews died during the holocaust. Bees make honey.

Why did the chicken cross the road? Because it was late for its laser bypass surgery.

What did the rake say to the shovel? Nothing, they're both inanimate objects.

An american, canadian, and mexican are on a skyscraper. Canadian: (pulls off maple leaf) we have to many of these in our country (throws off building) Mexican: (pulls out burrito) we have to many of these in our country (throws off building) American: (looks at mexican) we have to many of these in our country (pushes mexican off building)

There is my brain said the English man stop leaving it in the fridge and let me mug you now get in the car OK!

theres a fork in a drawer half way open and a knife in a cup on the counter. how does the knife get into the drawer, it cant knife are incapable of moving

Q: What present did the Taliban's wife get on the islamic holiday A: a beating

Why do you do when a homeless man asks you for money Scream bicycle and then run

what did one waiter say to the other? were waiters.

Q: On a plane, a black man does not grab a bag of peanuts, while everyone else does. Why? A: He has allergies.

What happens when you put Michael Jackson in a room full of little boys? The 3 year-old rotting corpse of Michael Jackson and a room full of traumatized little boys.

Which is funnier: a sack of coal or a sack of old clothes? Neither is particularly funny.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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