A quadriplegic walked into a bar, and... oh, whoops, nevermind.

Q. Why dont people like shane murchan ? A. Because he wears chinos .....

Name three similarities between racism and sexism I, S and M

Why couldn't the old man see? He was deaf

Q: What did the fish say when it swam into a concrete wall? A: Fish don't have vocal cords that allow them to speak in a way discernable by humans, and if they did, it would just sound garbled and bubbly due to their being underwater.

Q: why did the monkey fall out of the tree? A: because it was dead.

the game

Why couldn't the melons get married? As gay cantaloupes, their jurisdiction didn't allow for same-sex marriage.

Why was the protester on the floor? Because the protest had become a riot, and police brutality is a serious issue.

The past the present and the future walk into a bar it made no logical sense that three things that will always contradict each other exist with each other and can walk into a bar without limbs or being alive it wasn't tense it was tree

What happened to George's pet rock? It ran away.

Why were 5 tall white guys sitting on a bench? They were in the NBA

Why did the school fall? Because a hurricane hit.

What do you call a black man backfilping off a roof The dark knight

Intercom:ALERT! THERES AND EXTREIMEST IS THE SCHOOL! Little kid: Sir, can I borrow that towel on your head? BOOOOOOM!

Q.Why did the dinosaur cross the road? A.Because chickens weren't invented then.

what do you call a guy that looks exactly like Mario. Frank because thats his name.

Why did the chicken cro- Oh. He got run over.

Q: whats worse than 10 dead babies in 1 trashcan? A: 1 dead baby in 10 trashcans

Okay, after this one then...

Whats invisable and smells like a apple? An invisable apple

I dig, you dig, we dig, they dig, he digs, she digs, everybody digs. Guys, it's not a very profound poem, but it's deep.

quantum physics?

Just aids, and gonnoreah, and... Jk, I wont type it here, and I am not "suffering" from nothing, its a condition, it can be a struggle, and yeah it could turn fatal, on the bright side its not contagious (its genetics, flawed genetics) but on the bright side, so far chances are greater of me dying from a giant meteor falling on me as I sleep, than from this... Not disease, genetic flaw, take it from a guy that was born without toenails, has two eardrums and some weird tiny holes on his ears (I can send you a pic of those tiny weird holes, they are not weird, kinda cute I been told and can say so myself) so you calm yet?

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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