have u been drinking cannabel soup because you........ahhhhh!!!!! why are you trying to eat me!

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a mother cow walks up to her three child cows. the first cow asks: "mom, why am i named rose?" the mother responds with: "because when you were a baby, a rose petal fell on your head." the second cow asks: "what about me, mom?" the mother says: "when you were a baby, a daisy petal fell on your head." the third cow says: "AAAAOOOOOOAOAOAOAOAOAOAOAOAO!" the mother screams: "SHUT UP REFRIDGERATOR."

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Whats 1+1? window!

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Whats red and has wheels? An apple, I was just kidding about the wheels.

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People really hate it when sentenses don't end the way elephants wear hats

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What is BIG, STIFF, AND FULL OF SEMEN!!!? A SUBMARINE!!!!!!!

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Knock knock. whos their! Grammar police. We'd like to have a little chat.

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Do you want to hear a joke? No.

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Why was six afraid of seven? Six wasn't. He listens in on women's self defense classes and can deliver a kick to the crotch so hard that it will create for you a new vagina.

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What do you call a fish with one eye? A fish

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Why are rich people usually fat? They're living large

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A man walks into a bar. He asks for a beer. One of the bar tenders twlls him they are all out. He takes out his gun. He has 1 bullet and there are 3 bar tenders. He wants to kill them all. What does he do? A: Shoots 1 and pegs bricks at the other two.

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Q: What's white and sticky? A: Glue.

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How many blond girls does it take to screw in a light bulb? 1, it is a faily simple task

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Ok so a black guy is packing his bags for college and then......... wait a minute?

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Why did the chicken cross the road? Because it was tired of hearing that joke

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knock knock, whos there, isaac touch my titty

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One day there was 2 black guys in hoodys with knives in there hand. They tapped me on the shoulder and took my groceries. They then made me a jam sandwich and went on there way

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What's worse than biting into an apple and finding a worm in it? The Holocaust.

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What do you call a man with a spade in his head? ...An innocent, family orientated murder victim.  X

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What's fat, gay, and ugly. A fat, gay, and ugly guy.

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Why did the little girl fall off the swing? Because she didn't have any arms.

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Obama Getting Re-Elected.

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We are not even in the same country, and my eye becomes infected two times a minute or something so I wont be going anywhere. I mean, if you are some guy trying to be a girl in order to screw with me, let me first of all thank you for our exchange of ideas and concepts, and then say that if you are a guy, that likes other guys, then... Well, lets just say that if you are a man, that I don`t speak with men in general, takes away time I can spend with the ladies.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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