What did the millionaire say to the hobo? Hi there.

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Q:what is long ,black and red but smells like poo.? A:poo from someone dying of bowel cancer.!

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Where was Susy after the bombing? Everywhere.

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There once was a man from Nantucket He decided to sail to Portland Now he lives in Portland.

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What did the girl get for her birthday? the Plan B pill

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What's funny about a car accident involving three children, a widow, and a dog? Nothing.

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Who needs god when coffee is cheaper

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Hail Hitler

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A lost young boy walks into a bar to ask for a map. The Bartender takes him into a room and rapes him.

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What do you call someone who kills a black man? A murderer

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Yo Mama so ugly I don't know how she found your dad.

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What happened to the frog that broke down? It got toad.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? I don't know.

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Q: Whats black and hangs from a tree???? A: A tire!!!!!!!!!!!

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There was three women stuck on an island, a blonde, a brunette and a ranga. They are saved days later.

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Why do bears go to school on Sunday's? They don't, bears don't go to school.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? To visit his mother at the hospital who is dying of cancer.

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Shut up, I already got that before you said it, typed it, whatever I do not give a fuck, I want the last word because, reasons of millions. I love you Nero come visit me sometime, wait ill come visit you, yes yes, but now shut up, I want the last word, because I made myself your bitch! You know its not what I mean the other way but then around again, I think, you are my I made myself your bitch, no wait, keep reading, you are, my bitch master..., pretty please let me have the last word? Never fucking mind! Have the last word, I surrender, I totally surrender I want my nose back XD.

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what happens when you punt a baby in between 2 poles? you get 3 points

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What's worse than the holocaust? The Jews.

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If a hen lays an egg in the middle of a roof, which way would it fall? To the east, as there was a brisk wind in that direction.

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Anti-Joke is a sticky wicket.

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There were once three brothers who were traveling along a lonely, winding road at twilight. In time, the brothers reached a river too deep to wade through and too dangerous to swim across. However, these brothers were learned in the magical arts, and so they simply waved their wands and made a bridge appear across the treacherous water. They were halfway across it when they found their path blocked by a hooded figure. This hooded figure then proceeded to step out of the shadows and mug them, all three of them were brutally murdered. This is why you stay away from hooded figures when you are being talked about in a story being told in third person.

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For Chuck Norris every street is one way his way.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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