A lot eh?

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Q. What goes "ninety-nine CLUMP, ninety-nine CLUMP, ninety-nine CLUMP"? A. Nothing does.

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Why do girls swim naked in lakes and oceans? so they have an excuse why their pussies smell like either tuna or cat fish.

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So I saw my asian friend at the beach on a really sunny day, so I said hi.

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why did the person cross the road? to catch the chicken

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mommy mommy! why are we pushing the car over the cliff?! the mom answers shhh youll wake your father...

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Knock Knock Who's there? A Crazy Rhinoceros

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Who is a pussy ass bitch and is and has a chode? - Jeff Misner

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What do you call a Harry Beaver? A beaver with lots of hair.

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Damn, I was gonna do my laundry but Amanda Todd drank all my bleach

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Q: What's worse than finding a fly in your soup? A: Getting your face smashed with a hammer.

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Jesse likes to jack off and lick the white stuff off of his balls and digest it

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What did the wall say to the other wall? Nothing, walls are inanimate things therefore it cannot talk.

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Did you hear about the dyslexic atheist that doesn't believe in god? His disorder has no effect on his belief system.

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Horse walks into a bar... Bartender says It's probably not a good idea that you're in here. You're a very large animal. Any sudden movements, you may injure somebody. I don't know why you're here. None of the glasses are ergonomically designed for you to drink from them. So, you should probably leave.

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What's worse than finding a worm in your apple? Finding a worm in your penis.

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Guy 1: What the shit is that car? Guy 2: Its not a car. It's an alfa romeo

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Why did the communist fail his history class? Because he didn't study hard enough.

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how do you make a plumber cry?.... kill his family

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Why did the blonde ask her doctor if she could get a new butt? She is insecure about its appearance and believes reconstructive anus surgery is the only solution.

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whats the differnce between a white boy and a black boy? skin color

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Whats brown and ryhmes with Snoop? Dr. Dre.

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Why was Jacob not allowed to play sports? He fell down in the middle off the street and got ran over 50 times and could never do anything again.

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Q: Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? A: Because it was dead

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops