There are 3 guys, a fat guy, a skinny guy, and sexy guy. They all work together and have lunch together. The fat guy opens his bag and eats a ham and turkey sandwich. The skinny guy opens his bag and eats a tuna sandwich. The sexy guy opens his bag and eats an egg sandwich. The fat guy finishes his meal. The skinny guy saves half for later. The sexy guy ate more than half of his food. A genie magically appears. The End

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Happy Birthday! Your mom is dead!

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Why did the chicken cross the road? To get to the other side. 97

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okay so three men are in a plane ( this is the type of plane you can open the windows) so the stewardess goes up to the first man he asks for a gun she agrees but hes gotta throw it out the window he confused but he does it anyways the stewardess goes to the second man he asks for a beer she agrees but he has to throw it out the window hes confused but he does it anyways the stewardess walks up the the third man he asks for a pack of C4 she agrees but hes gotta throw it out the window without hesitation he gets it and throws it out the window. so they land and the first man sees a women crieing i was walking down the street and got hit in the head by a gun and arested for being armed the second man sees a hobo cheering loudly hes says he was sleeping in the ally and it started raining budlight the third man shes a women hysterically laughing she says i was going to work and spilled my coffe then my house blew up!

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What's funnier than my jokes? your face.

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so there is a 13 year old boy who got left home while the rest of his family was driving to colorado, so the police comes to his door, and says son your whole family has just died in a plane accident. And the boy says, but my family was driving. . . the policeman then says, i'm aware, the plane actually hit their car and only killed your family.

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Who is the fastest kid in AA? Alex Solomos

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Q: What is the difference between a potato chip and a frog? A: Neither one of them is a flower.

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Why did the rooster die. Because I killed it.

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What do you do when you see a half-dead black man on the floor? Call an ambulance before he bleeds out causing sepsis.

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Your momma's so fat she ate oranges and coffe

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You mom is to dumb when she herd about Walgreens she thout all the walls were green

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Yo Momma is Like a Prostitute... ...I pay her for sexual intecourse

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Why did the black man have a gun in his hand? He was crossing through a dangerous neighborhood and was offering protection to himself and his family.

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What did the duck say? Nothing. Everyone knows that ducks can't talk.

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What should you never give to your friends as a wedding present? An old plastic bag full of rubbish.

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Q:Did you know Helen Keller had a tree house? A: Neither did she

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What's worse than nailing 10 babies to one tree? nailing 1 baby to ten trees.

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What would Martin Luther King Jr. do if he was alive today? Scream at the top of his lungs as he tried to punch out the top of his coffin.

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Dumb

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Knock-Knock Who's there? The The Who? The Beatles!

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Whats bigger than a toaster and smaller than an oven? ... ... ... ... ... ... ... .... .... . ... . . . ..... ...... ..... a microwave . ..... . ... ...

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Honk if you're Amish!

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Q: Why does it take three Polacks to change a light bulb? A: Because they're so damn stupid.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops