A man walks into a bar. He leaves a large rucksack by the pool table and walks out. The rucksack then explodes and kills 13 people because it is the height of the Troubles and the man is a member of the IRA, who targetted the bar because it is regularly visited by British servicemen. The media extensively cover the story, and the two sides of the conflict in Northern Ireland decide that the bloodshed must stop, which eventually made way to the Good Friday agreement of 1998.

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A man arrives at his work late, his boss says "why are you late?" Then man replys "...................." he was dead.

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I was just thinking of how much i laughed at the challenger launch.

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Knock Knock. Who's there? The police. You're under arrest. The police you're under arrest who? Sir, if you don't open up the door we're going to have to open it ourselves. We have a warrant for your arrest. Sir if you don't open up the door we're going to have to open it ourselves we have a warrant for your arrest who? Sir we are authorized to use deadly force. If you don't comply we will shoot to kill. Sir we are authorized to use deadly force if you don't comply we will shoot to kill wh-

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why was the little boy crying? he was at his mother's funeral.

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Lets just say some of my boys owed me a favor, and that if we where all "clean slate workers" I would never have been able to pull some favors out of the higher ups. As far as for "these Shadows" of yours, I know nothing, while I invented the encoding format for the messages you use, I intend keeping it to myself. People here will still assume this is bullshit unless you get somebody to hack this site, believe me, its pretty damn easy to retrieve whatever data might have been lost.

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When life gives you lemons, you are most likely in the fruit section of the grocery store.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? I don't know, I was asking you.

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You know you're dyslexic when life gives you melons.

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What did the Atheist say in church? His best friend's eulogy.

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A rabbi and a priest walk into a bar, they manage to have a delightful evening, despite their religious differences.

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why was the woman crying? her son killed 5 people.

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did you hear the one about the elephant with a screwdriver? me neither...

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A horse walks into a bar. The barman says 'who the f*ck let a horse in here, get it out now'.

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What did the boy with no arms and no legs get for Christmas? Cancer.

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3 men walk into a bar. The 4th one ducks.

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Colloqiual irregularities are a significant part of the English language, and excellent example of this is between can and may.

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Whats funnier than a massacre? Everything.

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Two polar bears, oddly enough, are sitting in a bathtub. One of them asks "Could you pass the soap?" The other obliges and gives him the soap.

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A man walks outside and sits down to eat his sandwich.

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Why was the baby flying? Because it's face was stapled to the propeller of a helicopter.

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Roses are black, Violets are black, Everything's black, I'm blind.

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Bläeghen-Fassybìll-No?cheb!

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THIS ONE TIME MY DOG ATE A WHOLE CHEESECAKE

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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