Roses are red. Violets are blue. I have alzheimers. Cheese on toast.

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Why do catholic priests enjoy the company of boys? Because they must remain celibate and cannot have children of their own.

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what did the white guy say to the black guy? nothing because hes racist and hates blacks people

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Colin Fry backwards is yrF niloC

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Hey Johnny what's after 2?? 3.

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What do lazy asses get for Christmas? Fat

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Who let the dogs out? The burglar, he broke the door and they ran out.

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I want to die peacefully in my sleep, like my grandfather.. Not screaming and yelling like the passengers in his car.

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Did you know there was a black man in my family tree? He married my aunt.

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What does it take to shit in a shower?? To choke on a whambar and be 90 kgs!

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My uncle got hit by a truck, what was the last thing to go through his mind? The drive shaft.

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Why was the boy sad? He had a frog stapled to his face.

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If quizzes are quizical, what are tests? Testicals

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Howmany licks does it take till you get to the tootsie roll center of tootsie pop? Well, The answer is not constant. There are many variables that need to be taken into account. Though the ph level of human saliva is a neutral seven it can vary about 2 tenths of a point from person to person. This is a factor that needs to be considered along with the size of the tongue, roughness of the tongue, and at what speed the licking is taking place at. After taking all these variables into consideration, the average number of licks it would take untill the chocolate center of a tootsie pop is approximately, 3 .

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Q. How many grains of rice can you fit in an egg? A. Fire extinguisher.

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why did the kid strike out in baseball he had leprosy and his arms were amputated

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What's worse than finding a worm inside your apple? Finding an apple inside your worm.

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Ok so, we have bread , tofu, coolwhip

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whats better than 7 babies in one trash can 1 baby in 7 trash cans

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How do you say hooker in Chinese? ?

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Why did an old man cause a car accident? He gotf a heart attack.

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if john has 400 cookies and eats 300 what does he have left? diabetes

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What does the hulk do when he's angry? Compulsively masturbate.

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What did the biker do when he heard about Kony 2012? He became a social activist and did his part by contributing to the cause.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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