What's the difference between a hooker and an onion? You don't have to cook an onion to eat it.

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Man 1: my wife has lovley perfume. She smells like a peppermint cream. Man 2: Yeah, I know, I spent eight hours shagging her last night.

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What is funnier than one dead baby? Two dead Babies

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What are three things an average teenager cannot live without? Oxygen, Food, and Water. Duh.

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Who's a tool and a NARC? Josh Brami!

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A man buys cocaine from a shady dealer in an alley. He then goes home and experiments with it and other chemicals, and later on invents Coca Cola

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Roses are red Violets are blue I have a gun Watch me shoot you

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Your mom is so fat..., that she died of a heart attack at an early age and everyone mourned her greatl

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why did the hater hate? everyone else has a much better life

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Why couldn't the cat drink it's milk? Because it didn't have a face.

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What do you call an underground train full of professors? It's very unlikely that the passengers on an underground train would consist entirely of professors, unless it was a special service booked solely for the attendees of highly specialised lectures which required each audience member to have completed a professorship.

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Why wasn't the black woman allowed on the bus? It was rush hour and the bus was full.

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A man walked into a pub, and enjoys of a couple off pints. Some time later he loudly asks the gentleman next to him: Do you know about this thing called Fightclub?... The bartender had to call an ambulance, you don't talk about fightclub

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What did a Chinese man say to the other Chinese man? I don't know, I don't speak Chinese.

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What did the the man, the dog, and the psychiatrist talk about? The man's childhood experience losing his pet as a contributer to his symptoms of psychosis.

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Have you seen Stevie Wonder's new house? Neither has he.

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ProX hacker JazZ Has aids hahahaha

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How many Jews can you fit in a car? It really depends on the make and model of the car, as well as the relative size and weight of the people in question, but legally you can only have as many people in the car as there are seatbelts available for them.

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Ubisoft presents a game by ubisoft

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Whats the difference between Sarah Palin and Jason Voorhees? Jason has a chainsaw.

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Did you hear the one about Steven Hawking into a bar? I havn't either, but its probably a hoot.

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Q: Why did Timmy cry? A: You would too if you had your arm cut off

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A teacher, a consturction worker, and an army general are on an airplane. The pilot tells them the plane has too much weight, and if they don't each drop one item then the plane will crash. Realizing one item each is obviously not enough weight to throw off, the teacher and the construction worker team up and throw the army genral off the plane. They land safely, and live the rest of their life haunted by their vile actions.

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Why does Timmy Teblow love penis? Logan Cole made him do it.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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