Why couldn't the man ever reach his dream of becoming a professional athlete? He was pronounced with Alzheimer at a young age and could never remember his dream the next day.

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What did god say to Jesus. "Dude, she's not a virgin"

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That would mean that you are not its leader, or that you are, the result would have been the same, if you are the "head honcho" they would have gone for you, and your employees. Now, if you are an employee, they would have gone for your leader, and of course you. So between us and nobody else really its fucking antijoke, are you the leader?

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Why did the plane crash? Cause the pilot was a loaf of bread

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Why isn't Billy Mays on TV anymore? Beacause Billy Mays was in a tradgic accident where a bowling ball fell on his head, and a couple days later he died of head trama. His family can't bear to hear his voice anymore.

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Barack Obama.

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If pro- is good or favored and con- is bad, then why do people favor the constitution and stay away from prostitution?

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What does the Bill in Bill Clinton stand for? Bilious.

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timmy has no arms knock knock whos there? NOT TIMMY!!!

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Why did the kids put pirahnas in Mr. Hermann's fish tank? So they could eat him.

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Man: Am i going to be alright? Doctor: No, you're going to die.

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Where did the RICH black man go to? His home

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Why do you call a person who spits in your cheeseburger? A mean person

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what did the super popular, beautiful girl say to her stalker? i dont know, i wasnt the stalker.

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what do you call a dumb blonde with no arms? Her name because she will not respond to anything else

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Q:Why did the little girl jump in the pool and drown? A:because she didn't know how to swim

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How do you stop the mailman from performing his daily routes? You fill his house with blood thirsty bobcats

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What was the black guy doing in Mississippi? Just hanging around.

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What is less funny than a clown? Another clown ... but with fewer limbs.

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How many pastry chefs does it take to screw in a light bulb? One. It's a fairly simple job.

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5 little monkeys jumping on the bed 1 fell off and broke it's skull. Momma told the doctor and the doctor said,"Your a bad mom."

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Two scientists are experimenting with sulfuric acid. One scientist says to the other, "Did you see the new intern?" In the process of turning to face the first scientist, the second scientist knocks the beaker over and spills sulfuric acid all over the first scientist's hand. The first scientist writhes in pain as the second scientist rushes to find a strong base to neutralize the burn. After a few minutes, the first scientist is rushed off to the emergency room and suffers from some serious chemical burns.

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What do you call a black man flying a plane? The pilot. You racist.

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Why did the girl scream? She was being raped.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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