What happened to the black jew? He went to college and died in a plane crash.

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Why didn't the cat play with the ball of yarn? It was drowned in a toilet.

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Yo' mamas so fat that your friend said a yo mama so fat joke to you. You were certainly not amused.

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Whats pink and slippery? A pink slipper.

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What's the hardest part about watching a 2 year old get hit by a bus is? Trying not to laugh.

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Put my shoes on the wrong feet. Don't matter, i'm gunna die anyway.

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Why did the janitor commit suicide? He was sick of people's shit.

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How many dead babies can you fit in a bathtub? About 1 or 2, then the neighbors would phone the police and you would be arrested for infanticide.

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What do you call a bear in the rain? A wet bear.

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what do you call a black drug dealer? A pharmacist.

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What did the farmer say to little susie? I have a gun. Get in the car and dont scream or i will kill you

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Two muffins are in the oven, one muffin says "Gosh it's hot in here!", the other muffin says "HOLY CRAP A TALKING MUFFIN!".

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What do you call a unicorn that is both invisible and pink? The Invisible Pink Unicorn.

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welcome to australia. *kangaroo kicks you in the gut and you keel over, whereupon you are stampeded by wild dingoes and eaten by tasmanian devils*

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What worse than seeing a worm in your apple? Half a worm in your apple.

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why did the little girl fall off the swing? she was a double amputee.

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There are two blonds in a car, the driver to looks to the other blond (carelessly taking in her surroundings) They crash and the passenger is grusomely killed to the point of not being recognized and the driver later commits suicide from the guilt and pending law suit.

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Q. Why was the little boy sad? A. He had a frog stapled to his face.

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What's the difference between an orange? Two typewriters, because vests don't have sleeves.

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I walk the path less taken. Moral: Everything in life is a moral, as far as I care immorality does not exist, everything goes, I AM MORAL MAN!! He`s the MORAL MAN IIS HEE A MORAAL OR IS HEE... (you know Ozzy) AND NOW THAT YOU ARE DOMINATED you can go back to your fun, or reply, again, but you see, at this point I am already elswhere, so if you reply, you lose your control of your nasal coughanalcough nerve endings, and the potency of course.

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Knock knock! Go away. I'm busy masturbating, and it would be extremely awkward if you were to entire my residence at this time. Please return at a later hour.

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What do you call a Black guy picking cottnon? A cottonpicker

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John has 37 candy bars and eats 36 of them? What does John have? Diabetes, John has Diabetes.

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A jew enters a mall.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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