What's blue, white and red all over? Not a duck.

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Where do drunk asians live? In their house or apartment with their families, who are concerned about his drinking.

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What goes in and out of a hole? A Rabbit you people have dirty minds!

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What's slippery when wet? A wet slipper.

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What's green, covered in cookie crumbs, and lies in a ditch? A Girl Scout that was hit by a car.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? Your mom.

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Did you hear about the Mexican boy scout that helped that old lady cross the border.

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How do you find out the population of Mexico? The census.

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Why didnt the chicken cross the road? He was chicken.

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what's better than being stabbed in the testicles with a biro? the Silversun Pickup's album Neck of the Woods

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What's the difference between a ghost and a dolphin? A ghost isn't a dolphin.

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Roses are Red, Violets are Blue, I killed your family, and now i'm coming after you.

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Why did the first Monkey fall out of the tree? He was dead. Why did the second Monkey fall out of the tree? He was stapled to the first Monkey. Why did the bird fall out of the tree? Peer pressure.

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what do you call a old guy who touches children? my dad

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Knock Knock. READ THE DAMN SIGN IT SAYS NO SOLICITORS!!! ... yeah.

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This time I saw it, so that is covert hypnosis, I mean normally people are aware that they are under a trance, but like now it was like huh? Until the last point there. You used caps in order to make it seem as if you where shouting, the mind reacts that way and bam! The hypnotic state leaves... ...I was kinda beginning to enjoy that... Nice, now I totally do not want to eat this thing, strawberry my butt.

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Q: What do you call a half-black, half-hispanic man crashing a plane full of innocent people into a building? A: A half-black, half-hispanic man crashing a plane full of innocent people into a building.

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Haikus are easy But sometimes they don't make sense Refridgerator

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Hey

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what's the difference between a pound of liver and vomit? £3.24

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A Stoner sees a bag of chips.

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What's worse than a dead baby? Two dead babies.

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What do you call a griraffe and a duck who's favorite colors are both purple? A coincidence in which two unrelated species have the same preference in colorant hues.

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Why did Mary fall off the swing? Because she had no arms. Knock knock Who's there. Not Mary!!

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops