What the small boy with no arms or legs get fro christmas???? cancer

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Why is Lindsay Lohan out of prison? No, I'm asking.

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Man don't you hated when birds shit all over your car! Man I'm glad cows don't fly!

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100% of the people who go to school die. What about the people who don't go to school? They die too.

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what happend when the magic man touched fire? He got burnt screamed in my ear and died.

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What do you call a really bad band? One with a poor guitar player, a bad bass player, sloppy drums, obnoxious vocals, and all of the songs sound the same. Or Nickelback.

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What's worse than smelly feet? Smelly hands.

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why was six afraid of seven? because seven raped sixes mom

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Knock-Knock Who's there? Ketchup. Ketchup who? Ketchup-mustard.

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Why did the goat cross the road. To put his sacrifices into the pentagram.

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Roses are red, Violets are blue. I have a gun. Get in the van

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What's the difference between Jews and pizza? One is an adherent to the religion of Judaism, and the other is a doughy bread topped with tomato sauce and cheese. They share virtually no similarities.

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Still Carrying Heavy Pet Food? That sucks

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Why did the chicken cross the road? There was a worm on the other side. And the more pressing question is why do i watch a chicken in my free time

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Laugh.

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How do you get Helen Keller to keep a secret? You politely ask her not to tell anyone.

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Hey guess what? What? You're a Tree.

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Why doesn't the farmer have a dog? He doesn't like dogs.

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What's green and has wheels? Grass i was lying about the wheels.

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There were 3 children: Flower, Petal and Fridge. Flower asked, "Mum, why is my name Flower?" to which she replied "Because a flower was the first thing to fall on you when you were born." Petal asked, "Mum, why is my name Petal?" to which she replied "Because a petal was the first thing to fall on you when you were born." Fridge said, "Herp derp dur" to which Fridge's mother replied "Shut up, Fridge."

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Why did the chicken cross the road? I don't know... I thought no one knew the answer to that question...

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Teacher- Pick the odd one out- Man, whale, bat, squirrel, frog Student- Whale. All others are found in Nebraska

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Ruebin is Red, Curtis is too. i think i need a sweaty poo

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What do you call cheese that's not yours? Not yours.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops