What's the quickest way to a man's heart? A knife.

Whats gay and smells like paint? A gay man covered in paint.

Roses are Gray, Violets are Gray, I am a dog.

What do you call a black guy that feeds children? A waiter

Hickory dickery dock, two mice ran up the clock. The clock struck 1 and the other got away with minor injuries.

Why wasn't the little boy allowed to get a dog? Because the orphanage he lives at doesn't allow dogs.

Why was sally crying? She could hear her parents having sex.

If you watch the titanic backwards, its really about a magical ship which saves peoples lives!

What do Austrailian cows say? Moo.

When life gives you lemons you make orange juice so people will say "How the hell did you do that?"

What's better than having sex ? Having sex and being rich.

Why did the man walk into the wall? He was blind.

What do you call an giraffe? Well, you should probably call it a giraffe if you want people to think you are literate and know your grammar.

Sticks and stones may break my bones because I have osteoporosis

What did the plant say to the human. Nothing.

The WNBA is on the cooking channel

Why did the plane crash? The pilot lost control of the plane.

Whats worse than pulling down a girls pants and seeing a giant furry bush... finding out her vagina has teeth in it.

Why can't Michael J. Fox draw a perfect circle? Because he's human.

A black man walks into a house and is shot because it is not his house and it is 2 in the morning.

A man walked into the woods... Sorry, I forgot the rest of the joke...

A. Big feet, you know what that means B. He has to order his shoes on line because they don't carry his size in stores.

Two Muslim men board an American Airlines jet. Nobody feels threatened and engage in friendly conversations with the passengers. The aircraft explodes due to poorly manufactured engine parts made by small starving children.

why did the kid struggle in school? because hes mentally retarted

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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