I am hot he is not can you beleive it I got shot

thumb_up thumb_down +8

Doctor: I have good news and bad news. The good news is that your parents survived the car accident. Kid: And the bad news is? Doctor: I have a horrible sense of humor, they're both dead. I'm so sorry.

thumb_up thumb_down +8

How many licks does it take to get to the center of a tootsie pop? That is not nearly as important as how to cure cancer so let's not worry about it.

thumb_up thumb_down +8

Why did t chicken cross the road? To get to your house. Knock, knock. Who's there? The chicken

thumb_up thumb_down +8

why did the cookie go to the doctor? he had to get a physical to be eligible for his school's football tryouts. his mom drove him there but was very careful not to get his hopes up too high since his chances of actually making the team were slim to none based on the fact that he had no arms or legs but only succulent chocolate chips in every bite.

thumb_up thumb_down +6

Why did Michael Jackson get so many nose jobs? He was incredibly insecure.

thumb_up thumb_down +6

Roses are black, violets are black. I'm Hellen Keller.

thumb_up thumb_down +6

Shaun Sutton Call me: 1-800-tryhard ;)

thumb_up thumb_down +6

A horse walks into a bar. The owner promptly calls a local farmer to let him know that his horse has escaped again.

thumb_up thumb_down +6

How many wheelchair users does it take to change a light bulb? - They are not physically capable

thumb_up thumb_down +6

Roses are red. Violets are blue. I'm chuck norris. And I approve of this message.

thumb_up thumb_down +6

What do you call a black guy who works at McDonald's? A worker, you racist piece of shit!

thumb_up thumb_down +6

What could be happier than a fat guy eating 20 pies? The guy he bought it from!

thumb_up thumb_down +6

Knock Knock Whose there? The pizza you ordered That's weird, the Pizza I ordered shouldn't be able to talk

thumb_up thumb_down +6

So coool! How did you do that dinosaur!?

thumb_up thumb_down +6

Your mothers so dumb that when she had to take a math test, she received a significantly lower grade than the rest of her classmates.

thumb_up thumb_down +6

What did the orphan get for christmas? Cancer.

thumb_up thumb_down +6

What's worse than finding half a worm in your apple? Being raped What's worse than being Raped. Being Raped 2 times by a Giant Scorpion.

thumb_up thumb_down +6

Microwave

thumb_up thumb_down +6

What did the boy with no arms and legs get for christmas? A present.

thumb_up thumb_down +6

If life gives you lemons, you are probably suffering from hallucinations.

thumb_up thumb_down +6

Why did the cat die? To get to the other side

thumb_up thumb_down +6

Roses are nice, Violets are glorious, Try not to scare, Oscar Pistorius.

thumb_up thumb_down +6

who lives a pineapple under the sea? a proper spazztwat.

thumb_up thumb_down +6

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops