A guy, arriving at the pearly gates of Heaven, asks St. Peter "Why did I die? Why me." St. Peter replies: "You died the same way everyone does. Lack of oxygen to the brain."

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What's better than getting second place in the paralympics? Having legs.

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What is worse than 10 babys in 1 garbage can? 1 baby in 10 garbage cans.

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What's the difference between a pizza and a Jew? The pizza does not scream in the oven

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There were 3 children: Flower, Petal and Fridge. Flower asked, "Mum, why is my name Flower?" to which she replied "Because a flower was the first thing to fall on you when you were born." Petal asked, "Mum, why is my name Petal?" to which she replied "Because a petal was the first thing to fall on you when you were born." Fridge asked "Mum, why is my name Fridge?" to which she replied "Because you deserve to be in one."

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learn. advance!

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What do you call the offspring of an elephant? A baby elephant.

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Why did the baby cross the road? It was stapled to the chicken.

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"the president is black, my lambo's blue..." no hes not, hes bi-racial.

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Whats brown and sticky? A stick

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Whats black and runs really fast? Usain Bolt

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Why was the jewish boy crying? i lied he was happy.

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ive been a naughty girl, and i need something to plug my hole. call or text me;) 1 (802) 299-5281

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Yo mama's so fat, I gave her a compliment because we should embrace body acceptance.

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Two Pigs are in a bath. One pig says to the other "pass me the soap", to which the other pig replies "Do I look like a typewriter?"

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Why did the kid need glasses? A monkey threw a fridge at him.

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Q: What do you call a white man with 5 black men? A: A friendly white man. Q: What do you call a white man with a hundred black man? A: A tourist in Kenya.

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How do you treat lice Avoid getting them

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A black man is driving a nice car when he's suddenly pulled over by the police. "Do you know why I pulled you over?" asks the cop. "No officer" replies the black man. "You have a taillight out. However I'm going to just let you off with a warning because you seem like an upstanding citizen. Have a nice day."

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what did the man living in the box buy with his new found money? A bigger box.

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Roses are red Violets are blue Roses are red Violets are blue Roses are red Violets are blue whilst you reading this I just raped you

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You: Did u hear the one about that guy walking into a bar? Them: No. You: He said it hurt

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prison isnt fun it also is bland kidnapping is a crime but get in the van

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whats big, white and will kill someone if it falls out of a tree? a refridgerater

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops