Why did god make asians? I dont know. Yah, me niether

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Where's my baby??

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What is the least funny thing in the world? This joke.

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Why did the Black guy work at KFC? To provide money for his struggling family.

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how did the bus fall outa the tree it got hit by a hellicopter how did the boy fall outa the tree he was attached to the bus how did the chicken fall outa the tree it fell off the branch

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What do you call a dog with 3 legs? Just because it has 3 legs dosnt mean you have to call it anything different

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Your mumma is so fat, she has diabetes.

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Whats worse than dropping your ice cream cone Your dad having brian cancer

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A baby seal walks into a bar... The bartender looks at it and says: too young.

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A baby seal walks into a club. The man holding the club skins him and makes a lot of money.

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Have you ever had Ethiopian food? No? Neither have they.

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How do you get a woman to stop nagging? Smack her in the face.

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Two colleague janitors sit next to each other in the coffee room, one says to the other: About yesterday... I checked three times and it looks pretty normal. Sorry... I wasn't around to hear the question the other posed the day before, but I heard it's supposed to be pretty funny with this answer. So... Less is better then none, right?

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What did the fat man say to the Spaniard? Nothing. The Spaniard was skinny and so the fat man was jealous and shot him in the face.

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What do you call a black guy that flies a plane? a pilot.

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What's the hardest part of eating a vegetable? Putting her back in the wheelchair

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You mama's so fat, that the doctor suggested that she go on a diet.

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Why can't Michael J. Fox draw a straight line? Because he has Parkinson's disease.

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What did the blade of grass say to the other blade of grass? Nothing, as grass does not have the capability of speaking and does not have a brain, all it has is a complex life system where it feeds off water. If it were to say anything though, it would say, "Hey! We're both blades of grass!"

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A guy walks into a doctor's office and says: "Doctor! Doctor! You gotta help me! One day I'm a teepee, and the next day I'm a wigwam, and then the next day I'm a teepee, and then the next day I'm a wigwam again. The doctor says: Sir, we've been over this 100 times! You have stage 4 pancreatic cancer...

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Why was the old lady sad? Her husband was raped by an angry gallon of milk.

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I know 7 facts about you: 1. You're reading this. 2. You hate this overused shit. 3. You may think I will skip a number. 5. And you hate me much more. 6. You have seen porn. 7. You want me to kill myself. I am just gonna go suicide.

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A red-head, a brunette and a blond are trapped on an island 10km from civilization. The red-head swims 1.5km's, but is to tired, so she swims back to the island. The brunette swims 3km's, but is too tired, so she swims back to the island. After watching the first two fail, the blond evaluates the situation and decides that she does not possess the swimming ability required to reach the 5km point (At which swimming back to the island becomes equally as far as swimming to civilization), and instead stays on the island and creates a signal fire out of bits of debris scattered on the island, getting rescued within hours.

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whats the difference between a bench and a mexican? a bench can support its family

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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