What do you call a black man with a lip desiese? Jumbo shrimp

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What is better than tissues? Correct!

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What's black and shouldn't have the right to vote? Ants

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What starts with F and ends in UCK? The F word but im not allowed to say it.

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What do you call a dog with two tails? ...Depends on what you named it.

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A newly wed couple is at the beach and the wife asks for sunscreen and the man says he forgot it in the car. He goes to the car only to find that the car had been broken into. He goes to call his wife and they go back to the car only to find that the car had been stolen. #Turns out the thief broke the window to steal the car but saw the owner coming and hid behind a bush and upon the man going to call his wife he continued with his mission

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roses are red, violets are blue, i have alzheimers, cheese on toast.

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What do you call a cup that holds liquid A cup

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what's the difference between a lion and an ostrich? they are both birds, a part from the lion

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What do you call it when Justin Bieber has sex with a woman? Intercourse.

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what did the leprosy survivor get for christmas a amputation

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What's the worst part about anti jokes? They get boring after a while

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A man walks into a bar... He has a severe drinking problem, and his wife weeps for him

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What's the difference between a Jew and a pizza? A Jew is a person who adheres to the Jewish faith and claims a cultural or ancestral connection to the Jewish people, and a pizza is an oven-baked, flat, disc shaped bread usually topped with tomato sauce and mozzarella and then a selection of meats, depending on taste and culture.

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Rarity: "So, what is that splendid frock of yours saying?" Maud Pie: "It doesn't talk. It's a dress."

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Knock knock. Who's there? The Postman Will you sign hear please he said Oh my toaster came

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Whats green and gets you really high? A green airplane

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What's the difference between Republicans and Democrats? There is a series of boxes which one can choose to check on a ballot, officially registering an individual with a certain party. Available parties include the Green Party, The American Communist Party, The Republican Party, and the Democratic Party among others. Republicans choose to check the Republican box, Democrats choose to check the Democrat box. Also Republicans are closet homosexuals and Democrats are terrorists.

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How do you stop someone from getting cancer? Kill them.

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Q:how do you fit 100 jews in a car? A:2 in the front 3 in the back and the other 95 in the ashtray

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I was jacking off I don't use my hand tho, I just use my gf's vagiina

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Roses are red Violets are blue I have Alzheimers Cheese on toes

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How come Helen Keller didn’t scream when she fell off the cliff? Because at 19 months she contracted an illness that left her blind and deaf and therefore never learned to properly use her vocal cords

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How do you get free money? Hire a black man to rob a bank.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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