What did the you know what screw this I'm sick of making these stupid jokes there all the same. Hang on hang on What did the pirate do to the dog yes This style of joking is so different I'm going to be a famous comedian oh wait there's a whole bloody website full of these. O look another one and another one and another one that knife over there looks really nice right now

A priest and a Rabbi walk into a bar, but they're wearing normal people clothes, so no one notices or says anything funny.

A young couple just gave birth to their first child and the doctor says, I’ve good some good news and some bad news, what do you want first? Give us the bad news first, the parents reply. Your baby has red hair, says the doctor. Well whats the good news, ask the parents. It’s dead.

Noses are red, Lips are blue, I have hypothermia, So do you.

Is Mike here? Mike Hunt? Has anyone seen Mike Hunt? Yes teacher, he is home sick with the flu.

What stars with C, is hairy on the outside, moist on the inside and ends with T and has UN in the middle? Coconut

Boy:U a dime Girl: she said ur a quarter Boy:-_- dumb B***h

If you have ten apples, and I take away three, then you will only have seven apples left, because ten minus three is seven. On the other hand, if I have a hundred apples, and you take away ninety-six, then I will call the police on you because that is stealing and it is not allowed. I will also remove you from my friends list on Facebook because stealing isn't nice.

Whats is worse than a dog bite? A shark bite. Whats worse than a shark bite? The Holocaust.

why did the chicken cross the road? To get away from the sadistic farmer with a loaded shotgun (as the farmer has an extremely large score to settle with the chicken, as his wife was dead, a cause of mad cow disease, an STD from the chicken, as the chicken is a pimp) thus escaping captivity and starting a new life as a free chicken. God save Martin Luther KIng

A guy walks up to a girl and says: " hey can I have your number so can I have your text you later?" she says " no" he says " why ?" she says" guess" He says " look if you don't like me thats okay, " he gets up and walks away, turns out she doesn't have a cell phone, she was gonna give him her house number to call.

You know how I know you're gay? Because you came out to your close family and friends, who were all very respectful and accepting.

Q: Where do zombies shop? A: Zombercrombie.

What's red and every where? A bloody soldier who just stepped on mine.

Why did the chicken cross the road? It wanted to commit suicide

why is justin bieber so pale? Because he hasn't come out of the closet.

What did the girl say to the other girl? Nothing. She got hit in the head with a pineapple

XD, You must really like me Nero, do you think people have problems telling us apart here?

What did the little Jew boy get for Christmas? nothing he is a Jew, he doesn't celebrate Christmas.

In class a teacher said "Stand up if you think you'r stupid" A kid stands and the teacher ask why? The kid said: "Oh I thought it'd be a bit fair since your standing up.

What did the dog get for Christmas? euthanization

Q: What has no color, no shape, no size, and was born in your mind? A: The thought you just had about this anti-joke.

Asians look like they have down syndrome.

why did the jockey lose the horse race? he mistook his horse for Sara Jessica Parker

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

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The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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